My pilgrimage

Confessions of a Frustrated Product Manager

2006-05-25T21:53:00.000+08:00

Okay. I am thisclose to screaming when my boss said his parting words to me before he went home. But before that let me first describe him whom we'll call Night Santa (now don't give me that weird look. Hikaru was the one who gave that pseudonym, not moi. Go ask her.)

Look, Night Santa is good. He's very good in what he does. He's smart, maabilidad, and he gets things done faster than most of the people in the bank. He's not afraid in throwing his weight around (pun intended) in order to get a project finished in a given time frame. He's very particular, obsessed, down to the minutest detail. He's very demanding as well. Many an instance came that he and I had our share of showdowns: raised voices, with me stubbornly refusing and questioning everything he wants me to do, and him continuously firing me with questions that makes my head go into overdrive mode. He's STRESS waiting to happen!

But he's a self-proclaimed uber fashionista as well. He didn't say it that way but he gives off this vibe that he's one of the authorities when it comes to "high-end" fashion (yeah and that means???) He's always picking on my outfit almost every Friday ("Oh ba't nakahubo ka na naman?" he smart-assedly quipped when he saw me without my blazer after office hours. I was weirded out.) and he gives out great Christmas gifts (read: ONLY Zara and Mango for us girls!)

The thing that majorly ticked me off today was that he followed up with this big project we're doing with cards and it isn't ready yet. So I told him. Understandably, he was disappointed and frustrated because we're moving too slow. He told me to give him the revised version of the product program, and then off he went, muttering, "hay nako. Ganyan na naman kayo ha, pag madali ang bilis-bilis niyo gawin, pag mahirap..."

Uhm, hello? Weren't we taught to answer exam questions that way, tackle the easy ones first before doing the hard part? If I only focus on the big project I won't get anything done in the first place. And it's not as if I completely dropped the big project altogether. But, of course, everything is MY fault.

He and I also don't communicate well. I'm sorry but I DO NOT UNDERSTAND HIM. I thought I was the only one having trouble comprehending him. I was even considering attending verbal comprehension and business writing classes just so I can understand him better, but it turns out that the three other product managers are having trouble communicating with him, too. I'm always wrong, I don't write the way he wants me to write: concise, clear and with logical progression. Well, I'm really sorry for being inept and stupid, sir, but you seem to have forgotten that you and I exist on different levels. Besides, I didn't have someone to look up to as a role model of a product manager for bank deposits (for heaven's sake do you know how hard it is to market money nowadays? Of all the things bakit pera???). You're TOO OLD (he'd probably kill me if he sees this). I'm NEVER gonna be able to please you with anything so why the heck would I even bother to try??? Go take the credit for yourself, I don't care. And please, your career path is not something I want for myself - shame on you for deducing that my non-committal responses and bouts of silence constitutes agreement whenever you bring up my career paths and other units (if you did).

It's a good thing that I can be brutally honest and gutsy to tell it to his face that I don't understand him in some instances (and I'm sometimes tempted to add that I'm sorry for being stupid and not being able to understad what he says). He discusses plan A with me, and I totally understand plan B (tapos sa huli plan C pala masusunod.) But he got offended one time I told him that we're not communicating well. You should see us talk. It brings the term "lost in transalation" on a whole new level. So go on. Take all the credit, I won't care. I'm NEVER gonna be able to impress you, NEVER gonna be able to think like you do because I don't want to be like you (or your work at least). Not in this organization, or until you prove me wrong.

See how frustrations can cause incoherent thinking and blogging? Different POVs, lintek. My alma mater would've been ashamed of moi if they see how I butchered the English language in this entry. Pffft.

Back To School

2006-05-22T19:18:00.000+08:00

I’m going off to grad school this July. Yay. Go me. Time to make sense why I’m doing what I’m doing. And time to use my brain cells again. (Not just looking for some other way to market and sell money.) 'Tis funny, though. The four years after college saw me as someone who never entertained the notion of going to grad school in the first place, yet here I am, abso-bloody-lutely ecstatic of going back to school.

I'm excited to buy school supplies again. I'd love to smell new, fresh notebooks, the aroma of instant coffee for cramming and making "a bouquet of sharpened pencils." The joy of writing on the first, clean page of a notebook always gives me a giddy feeling. Sweet.

The test was a bit confusing, though. Felt like those entrance exams I took back in college, particularly the one from my alma mater. I just snapped my test book shut and randomly shaded those A, B, C or D towards the end of the exam since I knew I'd never finish all of them in time (how typical). But, praise God, I passed!!! AND, (please allow me this pagbubuhat ng bangko) I was the eighth highest scorer among 47 examinees. Babaw, yes, but ok lang. Feel good pa rin.

Jo, if you happen to read this entry, I guess I'll be seeing you around the campus. Let's paint the town red after you've finished your SCRA readings! And go food tripping.

Mundane Things

2006-05-16T23:37:00.000+08:00

When we sent off our mother hen a few weeks ago, Dan couldn't help but remark about how old we're becoming during the three years we knew each other. "It makes me feel sad," he said, taking a sip out of his San Mig Light. I know exactly what he means. We've grown old so fast in this surreal world called the corporate life. Jaded. His melancholic mood was further aggravated by Torpeh who had this insane way of getting her cash out when we asked for the bill. She actually had a white envelope containing her cash, and was sorting through it as we're paying our bill. "P*cha J--- ano ba yan? Nasa envelope pera mo? Eh mga nanay lang yung gumagawa niyan eh..." Dan said, and the exact same thing was running through my head. I don't blame him for being a little frustrated. I guess it's the fact that slowly, we are manifesting the mannerisms of something that we're not...yet.

On a lighter note, last week I went to CCF's Bible Study on The Da Vinci Code and got to meet Quack's other friends from her DGroup. The funny thing about that night was when Chuck asked me where I worked. I replied, "Security Bank..." but I guess he didn't hear the "bank" part. He thought that I really worked for Security (as in Security Guard). He made gun motions with his hands, and I said, "Oh my gosh...you actually thought I had a gun holster with me???" and everyone on the table erupted into giggles. Quacks quipped, "Actually batuta yung akala niya..." Hay. Can we please expedite (yuk that's such a corporate term) the corporate image enhancement? It's bad enough that the bank's not very well known, but to have me mistaken for a security guard in my uniform??? You gotta be kidding.

I HEART CHOCOLATES

Got an email from the newly appointed Treasury Group Head with a letterhead. A letterhead, for crying out loud. At least some people's dreams are coming true.

Speaking of emails, I got an email inquiry from our Service Quality which came from the bank's website. The email was asking about two of my products, and the sender was (drumroll please) someone I knew from college. Since it was an official email I just drafted the content and attached the prospectus sheets, because I knew that Service Quality will edit and send it using the official email of the bank. Imagine my surprise when I got CC'd on the email they threw back to the inquirer with my name, contact number and email address at the bottom. I had a feeling it's gonna be one of those days...and it was.

He emailed me back using the REPLY TO ALL option, with these actual text:

Hi E-----,

Kamusta na? How's the bigtime banker?........

Bigtime? Banker? These two words DO NOT usually go hand in hand, and I said so in my reply to him. Boy, did I get teased for that bigtime banker remark. But at least it added spice to my otherwise boring day.

Alternative Route

2006-05-07T18:59:00.000+08:00

It's the season for promotions again. I've been with the company for about three years now, and am still holding the position I got when I graduated from the training program two years ago. My PAR's been doing well for the past two years (even I say so myself) but I don't know of this year I'll be putting the word "senior" before my current position.

Just in case we don't get promoted this year, man, I'd be willing to try this thing out. When I told my mum and my colleagues and the trainees my plan, they immediately burst out giggling, but I know they see my logic in thinking about doing it. I mean, an allowance of Php 5,000 per week for just lazing around and doing antics in front of the nation. What more could anyone want? I'm talking about

I'm kidding of course. But man, 5 grand a week is so not bad. Not bad at all. No deadlines, no cases, no trying to get along with people you'd rather see fall off the face of the earth. Sigh. What a great vaca!

The Narrow Path

2006-04-22T17:11:00.000+08:00

Make me a blessing, make me a blessing
Out of my life may Jesus shine
Make me a blessing, O Saviour I pray,
Make me a blessing to someone today.

=================================

It's hard to walk the narrow path.

But He's been persistent in making me walk that way

Because He is the only way

That I can be happy and fulfilled.

Things I Learned Over The Long Weekend

2006-04-17T18:55:00.000+08:00

That many people don’t know how it is to be forgiven – it constitutes repentance, meaning, you won’t do the things you used to do anymore. Funny how not many people realize this, considering the fact that we allot time EVERY YEAR to remember the price God freely paid to save us: His only Son, Jesus Christ.

That forgiving someone is so hard to do, but it’s the only way to get rid of one’s emotional baggages, and thus travel light.

That letting go and giving up your life to God’s will is the hardest thing to do, but the most fulfilling as well.

That being alone (especially for me) in the stillness of life in long pockets of time during the day, spent in quiet prayer, praise, thanksgiving to the Lord and reflection on His words, is the ultimate nourishment of one’s soul.

That in being alone, I realize that I am much, much loved by the people who matter most to me.

That being busy doing worthwhile things is a lot better than moping around, thinking about something that you couldn’t change.

That children’s laughter can always, always make me smile.

That you have only one option: WAIT. Until God delivers you His promises to you or, for God to deliver you out of the mess you’ve gotten yourself into. (from Michelle McKinney Hammond)

I’ve kept my silence for far too long. Now’s MY TIME.

I have a resolution which I jokingly told Quacks I’d apply to my life: whenever I come across a girl whom I’ve met but I can’t remember her name, I WILL CALL HER BECKY. Why Becky? It’s such a cute, affectionate name, and I already have an explanation for using that name or method. It reminds me of Princess Sarah’s maid and bestfriend.

Funny Anecdote: The group was asking for prayer requests from us. The usual answers were given: work and family. When someone asked, "Love life?..." all of us reacted the same way:

(Making a face): "Wag na muna..."

Kinda reminds me of the part at weddings wherein the bride throws her bouquet. All the girl make a mad dash to AVOID catching it at all costs. Oh yeah. ÜÜÜ

I Have A Question

2006-04-11T15:27:00.000+08:00

Anong apelyido ni “Beast”?

E di “Kwit”…

“Beast Kwit”…hehehe! Mamatay ka sa ka-cornyhan! Wahahahaha ÜÜÜ

I sent this text to almost all my friends. The memorable reactions:
Lianne: P*ta! Bwahahahaha.
Jon: Hayop sa kabaduyan a!
Larry: Wala kang magawa no?
Josh: Anong nakain mo?
Rosei: Pot* ang corny!
Jody: Nakakainis yung sinend mo sa text (I can just imagine her pout…hahaha)
Erick: Ang corny nga!
Sir Jun: (immediately scrunched up his face and turned away from me as I dissolved into giggles) … epal…dapat nilagyan mo sa dulo ng “kailangan pa bang i-memorize ‘yan?”
Celeste: (after snickering) Hay nako E---- gutom lang yan…kumain ka na… (eh at least bumenta sa iyo hahaha)
Sir Jan: (Siyempre hindi niya na-gets agad kahit na dineliver ko na yung punchline!) …

Hay. Ang babaw ng kaligayahan ko, no?

QUATTRO - got tagged by quacks
four jobs i have had in my life:
1. student
2. bum
3. feeling body combat instructor
4. guinea pig for food

four movies i would watch over and over:
1. LOTR 1/2/3
2. Meet Joe Black
3. Sabrina
4. 13 going on 30

four places i have lived:
1. Novaliches, QC
2. Kalookan City
3. Taiwan
4. Singapore

four tv shows i love to watch:
1. CSI (all the editions)
2. My Name Is Kim Sam Soon
3. Pinoy Big Brother Celebrity Edition (jologs ako!)
4. Unwrapped

four places i have been on vacation:
1. Boracay
2. Cabiao
3. Malaysia
4. Indonesia

four websites i visit daily:
1. blogger
2. yahoo mail
3. gmail
4. google

four of my favorite foods:
1. sushi
2. isaw
3. ice cream
4. chocolate

four places i would rather be right now:
1. home
2. paris
3. singapore
4. a beach in maldives

now that that's done, i am going to tag...
1. ken
2. jody
3. jen
4. none

Decisions

2006-03-19T17:08:00.000+08:00

Have you ever felt tired of what you're doing? Of putting up with doing things that don't really interest you? Of just being there for the money?

I do. And I'm standing on the edge once again.

Do I jump, walk on the edge or stay safe?

Pihikan Daw Ako?

2006-03-14T08:33:00.000+08:00

One of my close friends is getting married on the 25th! I'm so happy for her. We had a despedinner for her last friday at Law's house, and we also celebrated the twins' birthday. Apparently most of them got bitten by the matchmaking bug or was really worried about me because most, if not all, of them were pushing, prodding me to uh "go out and see the boys." Okay.

Two of my friends said that I should check out one of my friend's friends in (ugh) friendster (say that ten times quickly!), because they thought he could be my type. "Matangkad, maputi...feeling ko magugustuhan mo yun," Jayvee quipped. I smart(assed)ly replied, "Okay, kung ma-typan ko, ano next? Wala lang!" Checking out friendster profiles aren't just my thing. It's more Torpeh's thing (she even checks out testimonials and can deduce what happened to your life from there. Creepy. Hehehe).

So anyway, out of curiosity I did check out the guy's page. My expectations were high since it came from two of my guy friends who have very high standards in all kinds of beauty. When I saw the guy's pic/s, my thought was (drumroll please!) jan jan jan jan...

"Is he gay?"

Psssh. I showed it to my friend and told her what my first thought was. She looked at me as if I was crazy and said "Hay nako. That's it girl. Ang pihikan mo sobra. Eh ang cute-cute kaya niyan?!? Go na, go na! Gwapo naman eh..." For the love of all things dear to me, I simply cannot go for someone with that first impression. Yes, maybe I was just too pihikan.

Don't get me wrong. The guy was really cute. But yun nga lang... He was too good-looking. Too clean. Basta yun.

I texted it to my guy friend the next day and he initially thought that he and Jayvee were correct about the guy being my type. I hated to break his heart (yuk how very melodramatic) but I told him what I thought. Apparently, he'd also thought of the same thing about the guy before. A-ha! So I wasn't the only one who thinks the guy is gay. It means, I'm not pihikan! If it was an issue of physical appearance, yes, one could say that I'm pihikan and I'll even wear a placard on my head to proclaim such. But noooo, it was a question of preference. Bwahahahaha. So I'm home free.

My friend said that they guy was a good friend and he can't see any glaring signs to affirm that his friend is ---. But other people say that he is. Sigh. There I was, looking forward in seeing someone who is cute, clean and 100% ruggedly male, but oh well. My friends and I would have to try again. =P

A Few Short Words

2006-02-04T15:30:00.000+08:00

TO WHOEVER SHOUTED "BOMBA!!!" THIS MORNING AT THE ULTRA:

PEOPLE ALWAYS GET THEIR COMEUPPANCE. ALWAYS.

I know it was unexpected, that it was unprecedented, but hell, I can't help but feel angry. I'm sorry, but ang bobo mo kung sino ka man.

A Senseless Entry

2006-02-04T14:30:00.000+08:00

Some Fridays ago the girls and I went to Enterprise for lunch coz Hikaru was craving for chicken. As we were waiting for our food the server asked for Hikaru's name (so he could call it out when her order came out of the kitchen). Without batting an eyelash Hikaru said, "Joy." Ash and I gave her a "what-are-you-up-to" look. She retaliated with a "what's-wrong-that's-my-second-name" glance and a small smirk.

When the server asked for my name I gave a small smile and said "Victoria." How I loved it! I like it because a "Victoria" sounds strong-willed, courageous, smart and all woman. It's definitely going to be the name of my future daughter. I used that name again when I went to Starbucks last week. Sweet.

I like my real name, especially its meanings. My first name means "joyfully victorious(!)" and my second name's meaning is "womanly, courageous." (womanly?...I definitely don't know about that). My future son will carry the name "Emmanuel" because it means "God is with us."

I love sweets. Especially the ones that are given to me.

This is probably the best message in a shirt I’ve ever seen. Better than Jacob’s “Girls Use Me” shirt.

Oh Gosh. Here's another excerpt of a girl's profile taken off from that speed dating website. Sumakit yung ulo ko pagkabasa.

"ako yong type ng person who seem to be snob pero ndi nman, it's just hindi lng tlga ko ganung kagaling mkipagsocialize, cyempre dun s mga tao n hindi ko naman kilala. . but then i'm kind naman especially s mga friends ko, ayaw ko lng ng plastic, wala naman..."

AAArrrrrgggghhhh. ANO DAW?!?!?!

Eto pa isa...

"I'm just a simple human nature...." (Oh yeah and that means...?)

Yep, it's that time of the month for me. And girls do need a bi-yotch fest every now and then. I realize that this is such a senseless entry but what the heck. I'm entitled to this every once in a while. And besides, it's my blog anyway.

A Long One

2006-01-26T08:35:00.000+08:00

Got this from some blog:

A - Accent: Filipino. I can also do Singaporean, Malaysian, Indian and British accents when I’m in the mood.
B - Breakfast Item: Four pieces of pandesal with palaman lovingly prepared by mum, and a plastic cup of Milo Freeze courtesy of Mini-Stop.
C - Chore you hate: Wiping food bits off the table, plates, pots and pans.
D - Dad's Name Ed
E - Essential everyday item: Kikay kit, Shmooshy and my handphone
F - Flavour ice cream: Amici di Don Bosco’s Chocolate Marble gelato
G - Gold or Silver?: Gold
H - Hometown: Quezon City, Phils.
I - Insomnia: Seldom visits me. Tampo na nga ako eh hahaha joke!
J - Job Title: Uhm feeling part-time combat instructor with the girls hahahahaha
K - Kids: Love them to death. Just don’t make me clean up their crap or their vomit. Ugh.
L - Living arrangements: Parents, brother, grandparents, two helpers. Four rooms.
M - Mom's birthplace: Manila, Philippines.
N - Number of significant others you’ve ever had: HAHAHAHAHAHA my friends know the answer to this!
O - Overnight hospital stays: Four days three nights because of one teeny weeny dengue mosquito.
P - Phobia: rats! Snakes!
Q - Queer?: Queer what?
R - Religious Affiliation:
S - Siblings: One younger brother
T - Time you wake up: 5.30 am
U - Unnatural hair colours you've worn: Pink highlights for one night!
V - Vegetable you refuse to eat: Okra and ampalaya.
W - Worst habit: Being blunt and straightforward to the point of pain, and I am such a BIG procrastinator.
X - X-rays you’ve had: uhm…three I think.
Y - Yummy: Sushi, dark chocolate hahaha (sori inside joke namin ng girlfriends ko to), isaw
Z - Zodiac sign: Virgo the Virgin and Rooster.

Uhh...

Found a website where supposedly single people can meet and interact with other supposedly single people via chat initially. It has the photo/s, age, location, and a short description of a person’s profile (a la Friendster with the more blatant intention to meet other people – and you don’t even have to be signed up for the service in order to see the profiles). So why am I blogging about this, you ask?

I found a guy’s profile with his photo, age, location and a description of who he wants to meet. It went “I want to meet a girl who I am comfortable!!!” (yes, it has three exclamation points, my dears.) Needless to say, I didn’t even bother to browse his page. Besides, I am looking for a guy who can speak good English. I’m such a bi-yotch.

My point is, if you are going to put your face, your location and (heaven forbid!) your contact details (yes, I’m surprised that a number of the profiles I’ve viewed did this) over the internet (where a gazillion people can see it) on a website that simulates a soiree, be sure as hell that you use correct grammar. Or, if you’re not sure, mag-tagalog ka na lang pre. Mas maganda pang pakinggan.

But then again, you don’t know if the information contained there is true. Maybe the guy’s just fooling around...

Wanted: Creative EP880 earphones

Arrrggghhhh!!! Darn it darn it darn it! I just lost my Creative EP880 earphones at the MRT today! Just now! Some snatcher must've thought that he could get Shmooshy as well! Kainis. My dad will kill me this time - he was the one who bought it for me (doesn't he always buy things for his princess? hehe) just last September! Darn it! Siyempre hindi ko sasabihing nawala. Hay. So I have to put up with Shmooshy's standard earphones. Don't get me wrong. The stock earphones are good, but man, once you've experienced the quality of the EP880 you won't settle for anything less. Sigh. Kaartehan, ano?

What the EFF?

2006-01-15T16:31:00.000+08:00

I’ve always considered myself very open minded about things, although I do tend to be conservative when it comes to the way I live my life. Being born into a Filipino-Chinese family has me celebrating two new years, speaking four languages – two of which belong to my other half’s celestial ancestors (Hokien and Mandarin), and widening how I see things. Add to that some months living on extremely conservative/liberated environments and I’d like to think the result is a female with very well-balanced views.

Perhaps this issue I’m writing about may touch some of the sensitive friends who take the time to read my blog, but please hear me out. (You know I treat these topics with great delicacy). I came across an article in the newspaper today that there’s a new phenomenon sweeping the US market – particularly the female segment. There’s a new medical operation that restores the hymen on the female genitalia – yep, one could be a virgin again! It costs about USD 1,500 – 5,000 per operation, but who knows, the prices might go down in the near future. Just look at rhinoplastic surgery. Add to that the possibility of having ‘it’ tightened again and we’re now looking into commercialized morality.

What has got me reacting strongly is this: it bothers me to think of the future of girls everywhere. It seems that science has put in another way to circumvent, ahem, morality. Do not get me wrong. I have girl friends who are virgins and who are not, but all of them say one thing: virginity may not be that big an issue nowadays, but you don’t just throw it away. It is a big decision on any girl’s life, and it is special, and it is a gift. And it doesn’t mean that if you’re not a virgin anymore you are automatically promiscuous and immoral (gosh, can someone please drum that into close-minded and judgmental people? Thank you.) I guess what I’m just worried about is a future wherein girls would treat their virginity as something they can throw away easily (or is it happening already?) and flaunting how many times they’ve undergone that restoring the hymen thing and how many guys they’ve bedded. Shudder shudder.

I fear for my future daughters, future nieces, future little girls. But knowing the kinds of friends I have, I KNOW they’re going to do their utmost in raising their daughters well. Sana na lang maging magkakaibigan yung mga magiging anak namin.

This Year's Promise

2006-01-01T15:49:00.000+08:00

First I'd like to share two light hearted things that I know would make everyone who knows me roll their eyes and smile. The first light hearted thing was that I got in touch with my inner jologs on CCAD's year end party last Dec. 29. It happened towards the end of the said party. Ms. Marlette hired Ate Shawie (the only guy who could impersonate Ate Shawie flawlessly! Think Laughline!) for the night and most of the people during that time already left. It was up to Ate Shawie to liven up things a bit so what he did was that he played the theme song of Pinoy Big Brother over the speakers and everyone just went crazy! From the FVPs and guests to the tellers who were there, everyone went to the center and just danced! Wahahahah! Including me (even though I've never, as in never, seen any episode of that program). Ang sarap palang magsayaw nun, hahahaha! I enjoyed myself so much!

Second is that I have new eye candies who are pretty much unreachable. Notice the similarities between them?

Jonathan Bennett from "Mean Girls" and Archie Kao from "CSI." SIGH.

I was talking to one of my close friends last night and he asked me how I'd been this year. I said I was very happy with the way things worked out for me, and I didn't want to change anything in my year, I mean, wala akong gustong balikan. I did everything the way I wanted to, and most of all I have no regrets in stuff that happened or did not happen. I was very happy, and felt more content than I ever felt in a long time. He said that I was one of the few people he knew that was really happy this year. Well, I think I have the answer.

Most of my more personal greetings this new year are from people who know me well. And ALL of them had one underlying theme in their wishes: that I'll fall in love this year. THIS year! Even my relatives were all saying, "Sweetie, it's about time someone sweep you off your feet! That's the ONLY thing missing!" Of course, most of the time I'd just smile and let the remarks pass, but I can't help noticing that everyone's excited for me to find someone. It's too much of a coincidence.

Furthermore, I've been having this gut feeling since November when I was in the Merlion City, that something significant is going to happen to me in 2006, and my instinct tells me that that significant moment concerns that mysterious four letter word: L-O-V-E. I am sincerely excited to see what 2006 has in store for me, and this hope of falling in love is gotta be the best of them all. But the bottomline is: will I let it happen? We'll see!

A Blessed Christmas To Everyone

2005-12-24T13:30:00.000+08:00

Christmas Eve '05 finds me thinking about my past Christmases. I have a lot of things to be grateful for - my immediate family is still complete and both sets of grandparents are still alive (Thank you Lord.) I don't know why, but this Christmas will probably the most meaningful yet so far. It is not just marked with gifts, with many noisy get togethers (because it is) but this time I feel and know that there's an underlying happiness in me that runs so deep, and no words would do it justice. I feel and know I am loved by the people who I love most, and even if there's just one person missing in my life, it's okay. He's just gonna be the icing if ever.

Here's a song that I always, always sing every Christmas starting from my freshman year in college. And it pretty much says what I really want for Christmas, so if you can do at least one of the things mentioned in the song, please tell me, ok? =)

Law! I want, no, command you to demand my Christmas gift to you in the soonest possible time! Alam mo na yun, hahahah! I'm so happy!

If anyone wants some information on Gawad Kalinga, please contact me and I'll gladly bring you to its best coordinator/team leader, Lawrence! See you one Saturday!

My Grown Up Christmas List

Do you remember me
I sat upon your knee
I wrote to you
With childhood fantasies

Well, I'm all grown up now
And still need help somehow
I'm not a child
But my heart still can dream

So here's my lifelong wish
My grown up christmas list
Not for myself
But for a world in need

No more lives torn apart
That wars would never start
And time would heal all hearts
And everyone would have a friend
And right would always win
And love would never end
This is my grown up christmas list

May kindness rule our lives
Not just the strong survive
Sweet tears for all the thousand years gone by
This is the world I pray
We will all share someday
Help me begin by reaching out my hand

-------------------------------
(This part is from Kelly Clarkson's version)
As children we believed
The grandest sight to see
Was something lovely
Wrapped beneath our tree

Well heaven only knows
That packages and bows
Can never heal
A hurting human soul
-------------------------------

No more lives torn apart
That wars would never start
And time would heal all hearts
And everyone would have a friend
And right would always win
And love would never end
This is my grown up christmas list

What is this illusion called the innocence of youth
Maybe only in our blind belief can we ever find the truth
(there'd be)

No more lives torn apart
That wars would never start
And time would heal all hearts
And everyone would have a friend
And right would always win
And love would never end, oh
This is my grown up christmas list

This is my grown up christmas list

Have a very blessed and meaningful Christmas everyone!

Of Shellfish and Cheesy Novels

2005-12-15T20:47:00.000+08:00

Hikaru, Ash and I were having lunch the other day, and I told them how ashamed they'd be of me if they were to see how I eat my shellfish at home. Ashamed, because even if I know how to shell shrimps and crabs, I'd always have one of our househelps do it for me, even with guests around, because I'm far too lazy to do so. (But it's only in our house that I do this, ok?)

Hikaru related how she and her ex-boyfriend would argue over meals, since her ex doesn't know how to shell shrimps and crabs and she'd always end up doing it for him all the time. Thus, she cannot eat immediately and that irritated her to no end. Ash, on the other hand, was the one who can't shell crabs (she could do shrimps, though) and in her previous relationship her ex patiently shelled the crabs for her. Problem was, she can eat the crab meat faster than her ex could shell it, so his one-liner was always "o, dahan-dahan naman..."

Not to be outdone, I quipped, "Wala kayo sa ex ko..." after which the three of us erupted into giggles. "Hindi pa siya nagbabalat ng hipon or ng crab para sa akin kasi wala pa siya..." I continued, high-fiving Hikaru across the table. Aaaahhh, the joys of being a member of the SSB Ü

Ukay? Ukay!

Today was the first day of the ukay-ukay at the canteen of the Head Office. I bought three uh, novels by uhm...Barbara Cartland for just Php 20. For those of you who don't know, Barbara Cartland was the predecessor of historical romance (read: cheesy) novel writers like Sandra Brown, Judith McNaught and Shirlee Busbee. The books were printed in 1974, making them older than I am. Yes, I read those kinds of novels wherein the leading men knew how to treat women RIGHT. Just the right amount of Manliness, Possessiveness and Tenderness...sigh... (hahaha I can see Hikaru cackling evilly at the background. I'm such a sap.) Which of course, I think, frustrated me to no end since all the leading men portrayed in those novels don't exist. (Maybe I really should settle for an Imaginary Boyfriend. Or those Genetically Engineered men Hikaru mentioned in her blog.)

Ash, surprisingly, shared my love of the novels written by the best writer of romance novels (ugh cringe cringe even though I love the books), Judith McNaught. My favorite is Once and Always, then Whitney, My Love. Ok, I can hear my guy friends screaming "Yuckkkkk!" in their college-boy accent from the school on The Hill in the background. Ha, they'd never guess in a million years that I looooove that kind of sap. Hehehe. And, oh guys, these novels were the ones that educated me on what happens when a man and a woman, uh...get intimate. I started to figure that out on my junior year in high school when I started reading the stuff. Wahahahahaha. So it's really been an educational experience for me =P all the breathless panting, moans and groans (oh dear, I can see Law and Jayvee having nosebleeds now.) Bad, bad Tabachoy! Hahahahahahahaha!

I Love This Song

2005-12-11T20:53:00.000+08:00

Lay Your Hands
- Simon Webbe

Sometimes life can be a burden
Tryin' to stay one step ahead
I feel the world upon my shoulder each time
I'm standing out on the edge
And my hopes have all deserted me
Like they washed away in the sand
And it's hurting my pride
Tryin' to survive
But I know I stand a chance

When you lay your hands
Oh yeah
'Coz it's the only thing I have that still makes sense

(Oh baby, when I'm calling out)
Give me love and affection,
Keep telling me, show me the way.
(Oh, if you see me falling down)
Lift me up from the shadows
Will you take me away to a better place?
(And when I'm in my darkest hour)
You're by my side, to turn the tide,
Until the suffering fades.
When life is getting me down,
getting me down, I'm close to defeat,
Come and lay ur hands on me.

Feel this road is getting longer now
And i'm too far away from home
Still I gotta keep on moving on
But I can't do it on my own
Baby keep my head above water
Help me swim for my life
'Coz the game is getting harder
The strain is gettin stronger
And I can only face the fight

When you lay your hands
Oh yeah
'Coz it's the only thing I have that still makes sense

(Oh baby, when I'm calling out)
Give me love and affection,
Keep telling me, show me the way.
(Oh, if you see me falling down)
Lift me up from the shadows
Will you take me away to a better place?
(And when I'm in my darkest hour)
You're by my side, to turn the tide,
Until the suffering fades.
When life is getting me down,
getting me down, i'm close to defeat,
Come and lay ur hands on me..

'Til I'm healed again,
Rediscovered my strengths,
Those bitter blues are gone...
Oh, gone...

(Oh baby, when I'm calling out)
Give me love and affection,
Keep telling me, show me the way.
(Oh, if you see me falling down)
Lift me up from the shadows
Will you take me away to a better place?
(And when I'm in my darkest hour)
You're by my side, to turn the tide,
Until the suffering fades.
When life is getting me down,
getting me down, i'm close to defeat,
Come and lay ur hands on me.
Come and lay your hands on me.

It makes me feel wanted and needed. *blush* =)

Don't Cha

2005-12-04T12:05:00.000+08:00

We had our annual bankwide Christmas party last night and it was so awesome! The venue was really tight but ‘twas alright. What made the night even more memorable was that our team (THE Red Team) won all the competitions! The fashion show, the Php 50,000 grand prize and the dance competition: all of which the first place were taken home by us.

I was especially proud of the dance we did. I was part of the team who seriously kicked ass on stage! Our dance number was a (very naughty) jazz rendition of the song “Don’t Cha” (Don’t cha wish your girlfriend was hot like me!) The whole crowd (not just the Red Team) was screaming so loud, it continously pumped adrenalin through my body all throughout the dance. We looked like hookers, man! (Read: fishnet stockings, booty shorts, metal chains, false eyelashes and scraps of cloth for tops. Beat that!) I saw all of our bosses (both male and female alike) hooting and cheering for us! It was great! Our team moved as one. Sabay sabay, pulidong-pulido yung moves namin! We were oozing sex appeal on stage. Hanep, promise!

Don't cha just wish your girlfriend looks hot like we do!

Oli, Jen and Moi

After we changed back

My Third Home

2005-11-27T19:11:00.000+08:00

(Top to bottom, left to right)
1. Cleanest airport ever
2. MRT's whole route
3. MRT station
4. Serangoon Road, Deepavali Festival
5. Deepavali Eve at Serangoon Road
6. Sri Veeramakaliamman Temple, Serangoon Road
7. Inside the temple (gave me the heebie jeebies)
8. A row of gorgeous indian scarves (expensive, too!)
9. You like chandelier earrings? I'll show you chandelier earrings! These babies reached past my shoulders! Darned heavy too!
10.Serves the best buttered naan and mutton in mild curry sauce this side of the orient
11.Finally! People taller than me!
12.Overlooking Singapore's skyline
13.Like u don't know the country's official mascot
14.Youth, Seiyu Bugis Junction
15.Sentosa
16.Can you say bookworm? Real Girls Eat by Girlosophy, The Chronicles of Narnia, The Rule of Four, Daily Inspiration for the Purpose Driven Life, Aphrodite: The Love of Food and the Food of Love, Tribulation Force and The Amber Room. All available in Books Kinokuniya, 2/F Takashimaya Ngee Ann City.

Will You Marry Me?

2005-11-23T12:42:00.000+08:00

I have just uncovered a disturbing revelation. My mom is seriously wanting me to have a boyfriend and possibly get married in the soonest possible time. If nothing is scarier than that, I don’t know what is! Turns out that she called up my Tita Dette one night when she (my mum) was in Bohol. My mum was crying, and Tita Dette was understandably worried. She thought something happened to my dad or to my brother or to me. My mum said she was depressed about moi. When my Tita Dette asked why, she said “Kase wala pang boyfriend yung anak ko!” I seriously think that there is something horribly wrong with my mother. Di ba dapat ako yung worried? Ako dapat yung namumrublema nun? What gives?!?!

I think my mum is envious of her friends who have married off some of their kids already. I know she’s worried about me, and the fact that I’ve never had a significant other in my life further adds to her dismay. She’s worried that I’ll grow old to be alone, with no one to care for me when she and dad are gone. I understand her sentiments. Granted, a mother should worry about those things, but not to that extreme.

I’m not worried at all. The reason is that I’ve put my full trust in Him that He’ll take care of me whatever happens – whether I’m alone or with someone else. It was a very conscious decision on my part. If He says, I try my utmost to do. I know He is still preparing me for His plans. I don’t know if there’s a someone in His plans for me (I sure hope there is!), but I know no matter what happens, He’s there. Who knows, maybe we’re both being prepared for each other ‘coz we’re still rough around the edges (especially me, knowing how stubborn and hard headed I am). I believe and know He’s very happy whenever He sees two people falling deeply in love in His time. But in the meantime, as long as my significant other is not here yet, well, I’m doing what He wants me to do. I want to be beautiful in God’s eyes. I do.

I have bouts of loneliness every now and then, and I feel a pang of envy sometimes whenever I see couples holding hands, laughing, smiling or just…being with each other. More so when the couples I see are elderly. I look around, too (don’t think I do), in case my significant other is already somewhere around the vicinity of my life. It’s just that I don’t think it’s something to be worried about yet, or, ever. Or something to cry about.

I’d like my relationships in the future to be very meaningful and not just a so-so chapter in someone else’s life. I want to be a worthy chapter in a guy’s life who, in case we don’t end up with each other, will look back and remember me with fondness. Such a tall order, isn’t it? But definitely worth it.

Meet my last college crush, Friar

I nearly got into so much trouble with this guy. I met him during my senior year, and thanks to the Internet’s amazing capabilities, I managed to secure his high school grad pic and made it my screen saver. Law was pestering me to change my screen saver, because “gusto mo bang maraming makakita at makaalam niyan?” since my laptop was always used in our group’s presentation and in revising our papers in the RSF. I reluctantly relented, and thank the heavens I did, ‘coz the next class we went to, our teacher gave a long lecture right after our group’s presentation and my screen saver came on the laptop facing the whole class. Whew. Buti na lang nakinig ako.

On Letting Go

2005-11-10T10:24:00.000+08:00

Got this in my email yesterday and I know it's the flashing neon message God is telling me about a few major things. Now I know what I'm doing is absolutely an order from Him. Homerun!!!

by T. D. Jakes
There are people who can walk away from you. And hear me when I tell you this: When people can walk away from you: let them walk. I don't want you to try to talk a person into staying with you, loving you, calling you, caring about you, coming to see you, staying attached to you. I mean hang up the phone.

When people can walk away from you let them walk. Your destiny is never tied to anybody that left. The Bible said that, they came out from us that it might be made manifest that they were not for us. For had they been of us, no doubt they would have continued with us. [1 John 2:19] People leave you because they are not joined to you. And if they are not joined to you, you can't make them stay. Let them go. And it just means that their part in the story is over. And you've got to know when people's part in your story is over so that you don't keep trying to raise the dead. You've got to know when it's dead. You've got to know when it's over.

Let me tell you something. I've got the gift of good-bye. It's the tenth spiritual gift, I believe in good-bye. It's not that I'm hateful, it's that I'm faithful, and I know whatever God means for me to have He'll give it to me. And if it takes too much sweat I don't need it. Stop begging people to stay. Let them go!!

If you are holding on to something that doesn't belong to you and was never intended for your life, then you need to...LET IT GO!!!

If you are holding on to past hurts and pains ...LET IT GO!!!

If someone can't treat you right, love you back, and see your worth ...LET IT GO!!!

If someone has angered you ... LET IT GO!!!

If you are holding on to some thoughts of evil and revenge...LET IT GO!!!

If you are involved in a wrong relationship or addiction ... LET IT GO!!!

If you are holding on to a job that no longer meets your needs or talents ... LET IT GO!!!

If you have a bad attitude...LET IT GO!!! If you keep judging others to make yourself feel better... LET IT GO!!!

If you're stuck in the past and God is trying to take you to a new level in Him... LET IT GO!!!

If you are struggling with the healing of a broken relationship....LET IT GO!!!

If you keep trying to help someone who won't even try to help themselves...LET IT GO!!!

If you're feeling depressed and stressed.... LET IT GO!!!

If there is a particular situation that you are so used to handling yourself and God is saying "take your hands off of it," then you need to... LET IT GO!!!

Let the past be the past. Forget the former things. GOD is doing a new thing !!! LET IT GO!!! Get Right or Get Left... Think about it, and then LET IT GO!!! "The Battle is the Lord's!"

Yes indeed. The battle is the Lord's. Ü

Man-made Utopia

2005-11-03T10:16:00.000+08:00

One of my favorite shops

Tidbits

2005-10-22T11:32:00.000+08:00

I am totally hooked on CSI Las Vegas. (Whooooo are you? Who-who, who-who???) It all started when my bro came back from a three-month training program from Japan. He downloaded several episodes of CSI into E----- Gorgeous and voila! I was hooked. I can finish one whole season in two days.

Every time I watch an episode I always feel like my job’s boring in comparison to what they do. Too bad our country doesn’t have enough funding for a state-of-the-art crime lab the folks have over in the land of milk and honey.

Another goes…

Yay! Oh dear! The Single Since Birth Club lost another member last Sunday. Chase, one of my ex-colleagues from the first credit card company in the P.I., took the leap. I was hounding him to death for the details, and was more excited about it than he was. Guys talaga.

A Much Needed Break

YAYYY!!! I'll be hauling my ass to my third home, the city of Merlion, Singapore! I remember Jacob telling me when he first stepped foot on that city. "It's a man-made utopia, Eunice..." I really, really need a break away from Manila, away from work, away from the people I'd like to see blow into smithereens. Heh. And I'll probably shop til I drop, and shake my ass down in Zouk or in Momo. And I'll eat their version of dirty ice cream, tako pachi, taka dog, roti prhata and kaya toast. Oh heaven!

MIKAAAA!!!

Haha!!! My friend Mabelle gave birth to a baby girl last Saturday (or was it Sunday?) at the Asian Hospital. The angel is going to be named Patricia Mikaela. My mum got all sentimental and has been hinting that she'd really like a grandchild soon. My bro and I, after hearing every parinig, immediately roll our eyes and go in the opposite directions. I don't see that happening anytime soon! Hehehe =)

To The Someone Who Almost Dared

2005-10-07T12:47:00.000+08:00

I don’t know if it was because of my much-delayed resolve to completely let go of all of our might have beens. I was tired of hearing things which I knew, deep down, wouldn’t happen, and I was tired of the silence. I have been praying for it for such a long time now – the strength, the willingness and the willpower to get over our unfinished business with each other. As I was going home last night, Shmooshy was playing Michelle Branch’s Goodbye To You. The song was very apt, especially the first few lines.

…
I've been searching deep down in my soul
Words that I'm hearing are starting to get old
It feels like I'm starting all over again
The last three years were just pretend
And I said,

…
Goodbye to you
Goodbye to everything that I knew
You were the one I loved [liked]
The one thing that I tried to hold on to
The one thing that I tried to hold on to

Right then I decided that I should finally, finally, say my peace. I suddenly remembered my conversation with Jacob’s twin brother, Isaac. I told him that I’m irritated with myself because it takes so long for me to let go. It comes then it goes. Nawawala, tapos bumabalik. ‘It’s been three years,’ I sighed. Kainis.

Isaac put his arm around my shoulder, looked at me with his old eyes and wise smile, and said, “Sometimes, dear, phases take that long…when you’re ready, you’ll know.” His twin who was listening concurred with the same wise smile and an uttered, “Amen.”

And it happened two nights ago. I knew I was ready when I know that there was no pang of regret, of wistfulness when I looked back on what happened (or what didn’t happen) between the two of us. There was forgiveness: for him, and more importantly, for myself. Now I say that when I looked back on all the riot of emotions of my saga with him, it was with fondness, and I smiled deeply as I realize how much I learned about myself and him from our chapter.

You can’t make someone love you. All you can do is to let yourself be loved.

I recall a quote given to me by Jacob about youth. Youthfulness is an excuse to do crazy things, the quote said, and one of its examples was to love unfettered. The quote ends with a reminder: USE IT WELL.

I have let go. And now I continue my pilgrimage and move on, lighter.

A Spy's/Stalker's Nightmare

2005-10-03T14:09:00.000+08:00

OMG! This is in relation to the entry of Torpeh regarding Friendster. It NOW has the feature of enabling you to know who browsed your page. Gosh. Stalking at its finest! I had 150 people checkout my inanimated picture on my profile page last month, and more than half of them are people I don’t know! Maybe they find inanimate objects attractive, feh. I’m more worried in being labeled as a ‘tsismosa,’ which is not really a problem, since I’ve already proclaimed myself as one. But still. It’s unnerving. Prime example: Torpeh’s reaction to her ex (but, well, Torpeh dear, that was such a strong word. Naughty, naughty girl!!! Peace!).

Although it has its merits as well. Got a number of Baldwins who checked me out (I think seeing sunset pictures makes people go a little fuzzy…hehehe). Some of them I do know: one was a cute guy who was a batchmate in AdMU, another was a friend’s friend, another was a batchmate from Taiwan. Did wonders for my ego!!! Hahaha Ü ang babaw! The girls puzzled me in turn. I didn’t put view profiles anonymously to ON, that’ll take out all the fun. And besides, if people are flattered that I checked out their profiles (‘Uy, pinansin niya ako!’), good for them! I like making people feel good about themselves. It gets pathetic, however, if you draw conclusions based on what your profile page tells you (Uy, maybe she likes me/crush niya ako/she’s not over me yet/she’s stalking me, among other variations). It’s the WEB, for crying out loud. Anyone can be anybody on the web. If it happens, it happens. Get a life, and get over it.

But this is another dilemma: how, o how, please tell me, how do I now check out my crush’s Friendster profile page and his blog without him knowing that I snoop around his page for, oh I don’t know, maybe thrice a week? (He blogs regularly, so there! Torpeh, does the feature include how many times someone visited your page? If it does, I’m dead.) I repeat, I am NOT going to set the view profiles anonymously to ‘on.’ Ahhh I know. Turn it on whenever I check out his page and his blog, then turn it off. Ang tedious! All for the knowledge of what he’s doing. S-T-A-L-K-E-R.

Fine. This entry is such an oxymoron.

Nga pala Torpeh, CBG’s Martin Nievera’s getting married on the 29th.

Any Kind Hearted Souls Out There?

2005-10-02T14:07:00.000+08:00

It's available here! The Complete Calvin and Hobbes! I was browsing the titles at Fully Booked, Gateway Mall when I saw the boxed set. Sigh.

The Complete Calvin and Hobbes, Php 6,999

Now I just have to find a way to buy it. Or wait til our Christmas bonuses come. Or pray for a super drop in its price (I wish!).

On food

2005-10-01T15:46:00.000+08:00

Menu at Ziggurat:
Enter and enjoy.
Sinful abandon is permitted.

Together Again

2005-09-27T20:58:00.000+08:00

I picked up my whole family at the airport last Saturday. Twas so nice, my dad who came back from Singapore surprised my bro who was coming back from Japan. And mum was coming home from Davao. In short, Driver ako nung Saturday.

My bro bought an IPod Nano. My mum told me that he was supposed to buy me one, too, when he heard that my Shmooshy's broken again (aww brothers are really sweet, they just don't show it that much!) but my mum told him not to since Shmooshy's gonna be replaced. My new Shmooshy paled in comparison when put side by side with that...that nano!!! (haha griping!)

Really thin!

He gave me hair chopsticks which I specifically requested. He told me he must've looked at almost every store at every mall in Japan before finding it somewhere. Haha, anything for atzi, huh? =)

Two of the sticks are actually pantutuli which you use to clean your ears...he mistook them for hair chopsticks! Hehehe.

Yes...he's back. I can now bug him all I want.

HANDS OFF!

2005-09-23T12:30:00.000+08:00

I found this cool webpage on phobias. It has terms for the weirdest phobias ever, like mother-in-law phobia, fear of needles and other pointy things, fear of crossing the streets, and fear of sh*t (feces, WTH!?!).

Aphephobia – fear of touching or being touched
Anuptaphobia – fear of being single (naaaaah…)
Philophobia – fear of falling in love (guilty??? Hahaha)

My friend, the ever expressive Torpeh, has this freaky habit of pretending to be my boyfriend. She does yucky stuff like holding my hand (with and without warning), putting her arm around me while walking (I am about three inches taller than she is) and saying, “Babe naman, ano ba…” Ewwww. She is all girl, but she does these to me. Maybe she likes to see me squirm. I, of course, react with disgust and a grossed out face. And then she’ll do it over and over again, and sometimes she’ll even insert a kissy-kissy face here and there. Ugh. Ew, ew, ew, ew, ew, and I say this with perfect primal colegiala diction. No, she is NOT a lesbian, she has Juan Miguel, for crying out loud, and he knows what she’s doing to me, so she’s not bi. She claims she’s just preparing me once I manage to snag a boyfriend. And she gets a kick out of seeing me squirm uncomfortably.

I’ve never been comfortable in too physically intimate interactions, and that’s what my close friends usually complain about. When they hug me, I’m usually the one to break the embrace first, and they’d have to say, “Konti paaaaa…” or “Isa pa…” I don’t know why. I am uncomfortable with being physically close in contact to another person’s body (maybe if it was Hayden’s or Brad’s it wouldn’t be too bad). I don’t give out hugs that easily, especially if I’m not particularly really close to a person. I once slapped a guy for being too comfortable with me on our second date. I gave out a very clear warning, so it’s not my fault. Believe me, it was hilarious for the both of us. We’re good friends now.

I recognize that it is a human need to be touched, but it has to be in the right context. You don’t just embrace a stranger, do you?

I know I also need to be touched or feel another person’s hand holding mine. But I’d rather have it that he is someone I strongly like (or love!). How cheesy. I wouldn’t have it any other way. I'd like my touches to be remembered and treasured.

On an end note:
Torpeh and I were walking in Glorietta when she saw Barbie Almalbis and a guy eating in one of the restaurants. Barbie’s back was facing the sidewalk. Torpeh said, “Ohmygosh! Ang gwapo nung kasama niya! Balik tayo, please, please, please?” Of course me, the everlasting bubble burster, quipped, “[Torpeh], do you really want people to ogle you while you’re having dinner???”

Shmooshy's Twin

2005-09-21T12:35:00.000+08:00

Why did this have to happen?!?! I should’ve seen this coming when Apple came out with the Ipod Nano!!! Droooool. Darn Creative. I. Am. Such. An. Insatiable. Techno.gadget.freak. So, tell me. How can you possibly resist this?

The New Zen Micro Photo. Drool.

Too bad you can’t take pictures with it. That’s the only thing missing. Boooooo.

Nokia came out with the N91, which is a phone, a camera and an mp3 player in one (well those were the main features). It boasts of a four gigabyte capacity, which will be able to store about 3,000 songs. Mmmmhmmm…that translates to about 1.33MB per song (wma or mp3), meaning the sound quality wouldn’t be as nice and clear. And I’ll bet that 4GB is more like 3.5GB anyways. Everyone knows that.

Yes, I’m griping. So what?

2005-09-11T19:53:00.000+08:00

One of my birthday wishes was fulfilled today: I got to kiss Liam Isaac! And Carlos Miguel too. They're so cute. Tulo laway pareho hwehehehe =)

I have other stuff to add on my wishlist. I know di naman lahat makukuha ko, kaya nga wishlist eh =)

1. The Complete Calvin and Hobbes (Hardcover) - this hasn't been released yet and it's going to be available in the US initially and in Amazon.com. If you want go check it out at http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/0740748475/002-0129820-1565611?v=glance

2. CS Lewis' The Chronicles of Narnia Book Set

3. Another shopping spree in Powerbooks, Amazon.com or Books Kinokuniya

4. A new pair of flip flops (kahit spartan lang. hahaha)

5. The time and determination to learn and play the violin

6. CDs by Don Moen, Gary V

7. The complete set of Left Behind novels

8. Higher purchasing power (read: higher compensation! hahahaha!)

9. Laser treatment for my eyes

I think I must be getting old. Last Friday my colleagues and I threw a despedinner for three of our former colleagues: Dan, Erick and Jane. We went to MYLK (bad choice, the food wasn't great, yuch), to Cena to have a round of drinks and then to Ice. Around 9:30pm my eyelids were already drooping lazily. I wanted to dance but I don't want to do it in such a public place. I don't know why, I just have a thing against clubbing in some place where I don't know most of the people. I'd rather dance in company parties, or at a friend's place. I feel safer that way.

Kilabot ng mga ------

2005-09-09T16:04:00.000+08:00

One of my bestest guy friends texted me something that made me laugh this morning. Let’s call him, uh, Jacob. Turns out he was, ah, manhandled (*snicker* pardon the pun!!! *snicker*) by 2 gay men at 9 am in the morning! Tough luck. He told me that one guy put his hand on the side of his (Jacob’s) body. Jacob told me that if the guy lowered his hand any further he would’ve decked the guy. He gets that a lot – when we were in Boracay, in Galera, at the malls – even now! He’s puzzled and weirded out and what worries him, he says, is maybe he gives off the air that he’s gay and available. I go, Aww. Kilabot ng mga ------!!! Ang sagwa! Hehehe.

He texted back, That is not a nice thing to say. =P

I replied, Ze truth hurtz, beybe. Ingat ka. Seryoso. Ü (I’m so mean.)

Let me clarify: I have nothing against gays. I have two very good friends that are both gays. They are both wonderful persons. Very decent. Yes, that’s the key word – decent. And they know how to respect other people (ergo, people respect them in return). What I don’t like about some men (both gays and straight) is that they can’t keep their hands to themselves. I remember one incident in the MRT that still gets my blood boiling. As I stood up to get off at Buendia station, the old guy sitting beside me quicly moved to my seat. Since the train was packed, it took a while for me to be able to walk to the doors. As I was waiting for the crowd to move, I suddenly felt the old man lightly palm the curve of my gluteus. Argh. After counting to five I angrily slapped his hand and said in a very loud voice: “Hoy mama. Ang tanda-tanda niyo na yung mga kamay niyo kung san-san pa nakakarating!!!”

Decency. It’s so hard to find that nowadays. The flipside is: if women did the “tsansing” to other men, it’s almost always 99.9% ok. The guys cannot, will not complain! Haha. Buti nga.(?) Serves the men right for having double standards for almost everything.

Another story: Lorenzo, another KNMB, once told me that a guy came up to him and said “I really like you. You’re cute.” Then he told me how the guy ran after him later that night. Literally ran after him. Hehehe. Pano kaya kung kasing laki ni Yokozuna yung guy na humabol sa kanya? At inabutan siya? Oh dear.

But admittedly, guys who are KNMB are really cute. I have yet to meet a guy who is KNMB and not cute by general standards. Just goes to show that gays have really fine taste in men.

On IDs

2005-09-07T12:04:00.000+08:00

Branch people act sooo weird in BSP audits. Case in point: a branch in one provincial area was cited an exception by the BSP of not having proper identification of the client. Most banks require at least a government issued ID or two secondary IDs. One branch staff apparently defended his/her position, claiming that “Eh dalawang ID nga itong nandito o, isang half-body saka isang whole body…”

Lola/lolo, ID picture yun. Labo. Sabi tuloy ni Rico J. Puno, “Gusto kong himatayin dun sa harap nung BSP auditor eh…”

Guffaw, snort, guffaw, snort, guffaw. =D

Symphony of My Heart

2005-09-03T21:39:00.000+08:00

My high school friend Mousey and I watched Gary V's concert last Friday in the Big Dome. It was awesome! He performed with the San Miguel Philharmonic Orchestra and the Maestro Ryan Cayabyab. OH MY GOSH. The concert was a winner! Such talented people!!! All the songs were OPM (Mabuhay ang Pinoy!!!)

The first song was "Kailangan Kita" and I admit, I was holding back my tears as Gary sung on stage accompanied by the orchestra. His voice was so full of spirit and passion, and the orchestra played beautifully. It was such a heart wrenching song. As he was nearing the chorus I called Torpeh up coz she just loves this song too. Grabe. Basta. You should hear it. Then he and Sheryn Regis performed a medley consisting of Ryan Cayabyab's songs, the most remarkable (or is it because it's one of my favorites? hehe) of which was "Tuwing Umuulan at Kapiling Ka."

His two sons, as always, performed with their doting dad. Gabriel has a rubber band for a body, seryoso. His father rendered a more upbeat, 'gangsta'-rap version of "Limang Dipang Tao" and they danced. Astig talaga! Ang ganda ng pagkakanta ni Gary at ang galing nilang sumayaw! I am a shameless Gary V fan but you have to believe me that it was really good. Paolo, on the other hand, rocked the coliseum by singing current favorites like "Hari ng Sablay," "Noypi," and "Wag na Wag Mong Sasabihin." Their parents are both very talented people, so what can you expect.

The San Miguel Philharmonic Orchestra was not to be out done, syempre. During the intermission they performed the songs "Bikining Itim" (slow version) and "Katawan" (the theme song of the most fabulous TV sitcom before the telenovela/teleserye of Spanish, Filipino and Asian era, Palibhasa Lalake). I never thought an orchestra would be able to play such beerhouse songs and pull it off! They made it sound so classy, elegant and brilliant! Ang galing talaga ng Pinoy! (Note my exclamation points in my descriptions. Halatang nag-enjoy ako sobra =))

Other guests were Erik Santos (sigh. He has the looks and he has a very soothing voice. I don't care what people say about his uh, gender orientation. He has talent, period!) and Regine Velasquez, who sang "The Prayer" with him.

Gary's performance was not like his usual repertoire of fast, danceable songs, but nonetheless, the passion and the spirit behind was the same. He was still Mr. Pure Energy as he sang jazz and acoustic versions of his well-known singles. Songs that made tears come into my eyes were Freddie Aguilar's "Anak" (a separate entry will be made for that song), "How Did You Know" (his rendition always makes me feel na ang sarap sarap ma-in love =)) and "I Will Be Here" (a real tearjerker for me because of the message of the song). I know that all these may sound OA and exaggerated, but that's me. I know it's because it was Gary V who was singing, and frankly, he is one of the very few singers who: a. sings for a purpose; b. is really very talented (double emphasis intended); and c. sings from his heart. Not to mention most of his songs touches my mind and my heart. Sweet. Fan talaga niya ako, hehehe.

Mousey, thanks so so much for that night. And for the ride near home. My mum sends her love, hehehe =P and buti naman daw marunong ka nang mag-drive!

This next entry I wrote Friday morning. Captured my raw emotions to the fullest, hehehe.

Burara

Argh. Why is it that I tend to lose things that are expensive? Why can’t I lose cheap, easily replaceable things? P*cha. My mum will definitely kill me if she knew I lost my baunan yesterday (which costed a couple of thousand pesos). Nakakainis!

Are girls more burara than guys? Hay. Just to list the things I’ve lost during the past two years:

1. My one and only branded RL blazer, given also by my mum (she still doesn’t know I lost it)…sigh…fitted very well =(
2. One MNG shirt (I’ve worn it only twice)
3. My 2 week old Lancome powder foundation (grrrrr…)
4. My very first 128MB storage device which I only got to use about five times
5. A pair of gold earrings (also given by mum…lagot na talaga ako)

Well, I haven’t really lost my baunan…not yet, at least. I’m gonna call up Bench Glorietta to see if they found it in one of their dressing rooms.

And besides, it’s not like I lost it on purpose. Argh.

At 10:15 AM: Wheeeeeeeeee!!!!!! My baunan’s still there!!! Thank you, thank you, thank you!

Present time:

Another indication that I’m burara: I tend to break expensive things. I broke Shmooshy, and just this afternoon I dropped my watch. It stopped. (Anak ng tokwa…) Now I have to get it fixed and it’s not gonna be pretty. Ang mahal!!!! Grrrrrrrrrrrr.

Scammers bummer-ed

2005-08-28T16:11:00.000+08:00

Last Thursday, an unknown cellphone number texted me saying that I won a Nokia 6630 in a raffle. At may DTI Permit number pang nalalaman. The text message told me to call another number (toll free daw eh ibang cellphone number rin. G*go.) to get directions on how to get my so-called prize. It was obviously one of those text scams circulating around the metro. I wanted to report it to NTC but I just had to make a scathing statement to the scammers. So, therefore, I let my inner bitch take over and texted the scammers:

"Sorry, but I don't need a 6630 'coz I already have an 8800. Ang cheap niyo ha."

Good riddance.

Caught Unawares

Suave, Pogito and I were pseudo-hosting a videoke party after our strategic planning in Subic. All our seniors were supposed to sing at least one song, or else, they'd be paying P500 if they didn't. Everything was going well until one of our female SAVPs who was younger (she's in her early 30s), single and has an X-factor went up to the mike and sang a song by the Carpenters entitled "I Need To Be In Love."

"The hardest thing I’ve ever done is keep believing
There’s someone in this crazy world for me
The way that people come and go thru temporary lives
My chance could come and I might never know

I used to say 'no promises, let’s keep it simple'
But freedom only helps you say good-bye
It took a while for me to learn that nothin’ comes for free
The price I’ve paid is high enough for me

(*) I know I need to be in love
I know I’ve wasted too much time
I know I ask perfection of
A quite imperfect world
And fool enough to think that’s what I’ll find..."

Somehow the song made me feel sad all of a sudden. Para bang nananadya. Eh tinamaan naman ako. Kainis. It's another reminder of my humanity.

Breaking Up and Breaking Down

One of my guy friends' girlfriend broke up with my friend two days before his birthday party. Oh dear. My heart goes out to both of them. I'm stressed out. I'm praying that those two could settle things in the most loving way possible and that whatever happens, they'd come out of it as stronger human beings. Sigh.

On to other joyous things...

Wheeeee! One member of the Single Since Birth Fan Club is no more! My college friend, Jen, finally took the leap to fly with someone just yesterday, a day before she turned twenty-five! I was ecstatic. Jen and I were such good friends back in college. We've shared our heartaches. Even if I don't know the whole story on how they got together, I'm so ecstatic 'coz I know a big part of her journey that brought her to where she is right now. I'm getting excited just thinking about it! I'm so happy for her. I asled her, "Pwede bang mag-pa-party ako?"

Max Brenner is sixth, Jon is the seventh person

Max Brenner told me last Tuesday, "Yung kutob ko sa iyo, ligaw-kasal ka na."

Last night at a party, Jon told me, "Alam mo, yung sa iyo, one time big time. Kung sino yung una, siya na yun."

Ngiii. We'll see.

An Open Letter From an Atzi to her Shoti

2005-08-23T18:34:00.000+08:00

hey bro. mukhang hiyang ka diyan sa japan ah. nagkalaman ka ng konti sa pictyurs mo and as usual, pa cute ka pa ren wahahahahah no but seriously engget ako kase hindi pa ako nakakapunta sa kahit anong disneyland.

anyway, as you've probably received mum's package by now, the bottle of the steak sauce she's ordering you to buy is seriously good. masarap siya kaya plis bumili ka jan nun. mum has a current obsession with steaks right now kaya medyo every other week nag-gi-grill siya ng steak.

dumalaw sina kowa and ninang with their respective broods last sunday. kaw lang ang kulang. chloe asked about you. si mm taba pa rin at si kenken ay maarte kagaya ko, naka dangling earrings kami pareho! ang gusto kong pasalubong ay hair chopsticks. yung maganda ha. ayaw ko ng makislap. simple designs lang ha, ha, ha please =P saka dala ka ng masasarap na food. yun lang naman kaligayahan ko eh.

ang aking mp3 player ay sira na naman. pinadala ulit kay dad sa singapore at ayun, papaplitan na ng creative. epal. kung hindi lang jologs ang ipod mini sana yun na lang yung binili ko. u bought any gadgets there?

o ano, enjoy ka lang diyan. buti hindi na nag-e-emote si mommy. a few weeks before sabi ba naman niya gusto daw niya bumili ng webcam para she can see who she's chatting with (as if ang dami niyang ka-chat!). i told her, "ma, please lang ha, it's just a month and a half to go at andito na si shots no..." i guess moms are just like that.

sige. take care and God bless! don't forget to pray.

XOXO,
atzi

sigh. i miss my brother.

Lists Again

2005-08-21T10:55:00.000+08:00

My Birthday Wish List

1. More time for myself
2. A text message, or better yet a phone call greeting from my younger bro and dad (mum no need kasi for sure siya naman gigising sa akin nun at mauunang i-greet ako)
3. CDs: Lifehouse – No Name Face and Lifehouse. Sure, I have the mp3s already, but nothing beats an original CD; Tori Amos: From the Choirgirl Hotel, Little Earthquakes and Scarlet’s Walk
4. Even more time to eat, sleep and just bum around.
5. Greetings from friends (hoy yung mga kailangang tumawag…u know who you are! Hahaha demanding ba)
6. A kiss from Liam Isaac!
7. The tops featured in the cover of Preview magazine (August 2005) [I'm such a girl.]
8. New sticky film for Shmooshy
9. Birthday noodles, hakaw, pork asado, shrimp hakaw and good old-fashioned hot tea (hahaha my Chinese blood manifesting)
10.World peace (no, seriously, I really want world peace and everything that goes with it.)
11.Have a shopping spree in National Bookstore and Powerbooks.

I've been tagged.
Se7en

Here it goes:
Seven things that scare you:
1) losing someone i love in a grisly, heinous manner
2) murderers
3) snakes
4) rodents
5) worms and maggots
6) presence of evil and malevolence
7) what poverty does to people

Seven things that you like the most:
1) food!
2) books
3) driving
4) beaches
5) sleeping
6) combat! Haiiii-eeeeeyah! (It releases endorphins. ‘Endorphins make you happy. Happy people don’t just shoot their husbands.’ – Elle Woods)
7) friends

Seven important things in your room:
1) bed
2) clothes
3) books/journals
4) laptop
5) mirror
6) pictures
7) my window’s metal grills

Seven random facts about you:
1) I have an eclectic taste in music (think Sharon Cuneta, Backstreet Boys, Westlife, Aqua, Lifehouse, Jay Z, Eve, Tori Amos and Andrea Bocelli)
2) I miss my brother.
3) I can’t cook to save my life.
4) I crazily dance around in my room when I’m alone.
5) I love giggling.
6) I use The Body Shop’s Honey Shampoo and Conditioner that smells like coco jam. Weird, but I have to use it since my hair is seriously stressed out.
7) I have very low alcohol tolerance. Two glasses of Kurant 7 and I’m bonkers.

Seven things you plan to do before you die:
1) meet my future husband, have a family with at least one boy and one girl, and rear them to the best of my knowledge
2) backpack across Europe with one person
3) have a farm and a resthouse
4) be a UN ambassador
5) take singing and piano lessons
6) go parasailing
7) live in Boracay for one month by myself

Seven things you can do:
1) sing my heart out kahit wala sa tono
2) do a very accurate imitation of how goofy and NR Champ is on Hale’s music video of The Day You Said Goodnight (haha Jody will kill me if she sees this)
3) compile historical data on fifteen different products in four and a half hours
4) play the guitar and the organ
5) make saliva bubbles
6) make my youngest cousin cry (awww…I’m such a bully.)
7) dance really well (ahem, ahem…all my friends tell me I do! [No actually sinuhulan ko sila wehehehehehe])

Seven things you can't do:
1) smoke
2) make a knot out of a cherry stem using my tongue
3) commit suicide
4) fall in love…YET!
5) go on a vacation for one month right now
6) extravagant living
7) go to a buffet prepared by fear factor

Seven things that attract you to the opposite sex:
1) simple
2) beautiful eyes
3) gorgeous smile
4) has a lot of substance
5) a great sense of humor
6) very real and upfront
7) sensible

Seven things you say the most:
1) lunch?
2) break?
3) combat? combat?
4) lolo/lola
5) (Friend’s name), stop it!
6) achuchuchu
7) all right (I hate, hate, hate, hate the term ‘ayt’ kahit sa text lang. Grrrrrr…)

Seven celeb crushes (whether local or foreign):
1) Hayden Christensen
2) Orlando Bloom
3) Jude Law
4) The guy in the Close Up commercial (the one that’s shot inside a bus)
5) Chris Evans
6) Chad Michael Murray
7) Brad Pitt (gasp! Only Number 7!!!)

SMILE

2005-08-14T13:22:00.000+08:00

Finally! I got to make a collage featuring the most beautiful feature on a person's face. All I have to do is to look at this picture and I automatically smile...hihihi =)

The bigger version is even better. Keep on smiling!

Meet my current love

2005-08-14T10:41:00.000+08:00

I fell in love with him the second time we met. Sigh…meet my newest crush, Liam Isaac! He’s so malikot and makulit! He looks like his lola, my Tita Lita. He’s not afraid of people, medyo pasaway nga eto eh. Nagpapapansin parati! He does silly things to get your attention. He smells so good. He readily smiles whenever you ask him to, and more often than not, you don’t need to tell him to smile whenever he sees any camera pointing at him. Well-trained by his oh-so-gorgeous mother. Sigh. Makes me wanna have my own kid tuloy. And I repeat, I AM such a big sucker for gorgeous smiles.

Tulo laway!!! Kakagigil!!!!!!!!

Snippets

2005-08-10T08:27:00.000+08:00

Another text conversation (between Lorenzo and I this time):

Lorenzo: Napanaginipan kita!
Me: Ano naman yung napanaginipan mo?
Lorenzo: Nasa beach eh. Basta what I can remember is naka-white skirt ka (yes that sounds like me) then nagbikini. Tapos may yacht. You were drinking lemonade. Basta lahat ng things nasa white except water and sky. (Huh? Ano daw?)
Me: Bikini? Whaaaat? Hahaha Ü ‘stig, I never wore a bikini ever. Sa bora ba yun? Ü
Lorenzo: D ko alam eh…alam mo yung mga “Am I dead?” sequence ng mga movies? Parang paradise watchamacallit. Don’t worry bagay naman at di bastusin. (Hahaha he knows me too well)
Me: Ah ok, no offense taken =P I like that better. Anghel na naka-bikini hehehe ang feeling ko! (Nagbuhat po ako ng sariling bangko. Thank you.)
Lorenzo: Hehe and besides there was nothing lewd. Just baskin’ the sun Ü
Me: Haha thank you for being hinest, lolo Ü
Lorenzo: Wala yun no…panaginip lang yun Ü dapat may digicam akong dala Ü
Me: Ang defensive ng lolo ko ha =P Wala akong kasama?
Lorenzo: May ibang tao pero ikaw yung kilala ko.
----------Pause as I attend my combat classes.-----------
Lorenzo: Hope you’re not mad or something…
Me: No I’m not mad. Nag-gym lang ako lolo Ü
Lorenzo: Whew! Ü kala ko nagalit ka. Good night lola Ü

(Honestly, what is it with me and lolo/lola?)

Gosh, do guys really think I’m that easily pricked? (Rolling eyes.) Give me some credit, man!

Random things about my friends

Jenjen and Laney NEVER let a Mango sale pass without buying anything. I think it rubbed off on me a little bit.

Law has the hairiest legs I’ve ever seen (makes me wanna shave them off mwahahahahahahah!!!!! I can just imagine him retorting, “Lay off my legs, you crazy pervert!!! [Haha you wish!]))

Sap twirls her hair around her fingers whenever she’s nervous or unsure about something.

Pogito, Suave and Torpeh are crazy about shoes (oh yes they are. Grabe! Can’t let a midnight madness sale pass by without buying at least a pair.)

Torpeh eats 5 jumbo cheese hotdogs for dinner at least twice a week. (Torps, do you remember Sir Ipe’s veggie lecture back then?)

Pogito has a birthmark on her butt. So does Torpeh. (They told me, ok? I didn’t peek!)

Suave is a closet sentimental girl. She pretends to hate mushy love songs. Wehehehehehe. She calls her Zen Micro “my precious.”

Pogito’s blood composition is half red blood cells, one fourth hot Nescafe and ¼ Nescafe Ice.

Didit reminds me of those adorable little kids in ‘Going Bulilit’ whenever she says “Nye!”

Law likes to write his thoughts on the border of the pages of the book he’s reading.

Jae has beautiful penmanship. His heiroglyphics are so much better looking than mine.

Law introduced the muscovado to me one afternoon in Odd Manila, UP Diliman.

Law and Petweet were my companions when I ate isaw for the first time.

Zee always smells like the strawberry lip balm of The Body Shop. Sweet!

Carlo is the second beefiest guy friend I have. Cax the hunk is the first, Will the meek hunk’s the third.

Jaypee has a three-word description of himself emblazoned on the hood of his car. (M-------- when wet!)

Wesley is the snootiest, pinakamataray guy friend that I have.

Pat loves to play the game “pretend-to-be-bag-snatchers-and-make-your-girl-friends-scream” right in the middle of a high-foot traffic street.

Mousey’s bloodline is directly linked to her credit cards.

S. Beauty is twenty three but looks like seventeen.

And Karlo is the only guy friend I know who splurged P12,000 for clothes in just one store. Now who says only girls love shopping?

Torpeh-isms

2005-08-07T11:57:00.000+08:00

This entry is a tribute to one of my good friends, whom I shall call "Torpeh." It will showcase her most memorable bloopers and blunders ever in delivering her lines (I Have permission from her, hehehe).. Gosh, she's such a sweetheart!

On fighting with her kabarkada's then boyfriend:
"You're such a loser!!! L-O-C-E-R!!! Loser!!!" (Ahhhhmmmm...)

On buying a hotdog in Galera:
"...yah, Tender Jocy hotdog..." (Our little boy repeated it over and over and over again...)

On teasing Jerome and Pao as Echo and Rustom:
"Uy...pwedeng mag-pa-ow-tograph?"

Upon leaving Bubba Gump because of the body odor of the caucasians sitting right behind us:
Me: Uy, tara na please, alis na tayo...(I was dying of the smell...phew!)
Torpeh (in a very loud voice): Why, can you not stand the smell?
Me: Ahm, [Torpeh], English yon, naiintindihan nila...

And this, by far, is my favorite:

On a Filipino saying:
"Ang hindi marunong lumingon sa pinanggalingan ay mas masahol pa sa malansang isda." (ano daw?!?!?)

Lost In Translation

2005-07-28T09:23:00.000+08:00

I had a very weird text conversation last night. Transcript follows:

Note: The X’s are the words I understand but don’t know how to pronounce. Thirteen years of Chinese education down the drain…hay!!!

Unknown number (UN): Ni hao. (Hello, are you well?) [Yes, it’s in freakin’ mandarin, complete with Chinese characters. Or maybe it was in Hokien, I don’t know!]
Me: Hus dis?

(I didn’t know I could write a text message using Chinese characters on my handphone until yesterday when I tried it out. I felt like an idiot.)

Me (again): Ni shr shei/Di si siyanga? (Who are you?)
UN: Haha, ni yow shr shei ne? (Haha, and who are you?) [Duh, you texted me first!]
UN: Kh Kh wo shr ni te pheng yow ahh… (Kh Kh I am your friend kaya…)
Me: Wo te kwo yi hn pu hao…wo chn te wun ni: ni shr shei? Don’t make me guess coz I’m having a hard time finding the right characters already. Nui/Nan? (My mandarin is not so good…My question still: Who are you? Don’t make me guess coz I’m having a hard time finding the right characters already. Girl/Boy?)
UN: Khe ni ta te kwo yi zhe X pu tsuo la. Wo shr nui hay ts ni ne? (The mandarin words that you used weren’t wrong la…I am a girl, you?)
Me: I thought you know me so you should know what my gender is Ü [Jologs ako, me pa-smiley smiley pang nalalaman…]
UN: Kh Kh pu man ni shwo. Wo shr chong kwo ren. Wo pu XX ing wun. X ni chien siyaw le… (You don’t talk much. I am Chinese [Duh, hindi obvious, promise!] I can’t understand English. I know you’re smiling na…)
Me: Wo pu ming pay lo (I can’t understand na) [Haha kunyari lang yun]
UN: Ni pu ming pai sh mh ne? Neng shwo ma? (You don’t understand what? Can you speak?) [Lola hindi, hindi ko kayang magsalita kaya nga nakakausap kita…]
UN: Ni neng kaw shi wo, ni shr nan ren X shr nui ren ma? (Can you inform me, are you a boy or a girl?)
Me: Mey kwan si Ü [Smiley ka jan] ni chay fey li pin hwo ma ni la ma? Wo shr nui ren. (Nevermind/It’s OK. Are you in the Philippines or Manila? I’m a girl.) [I really feel like an idiot…]
UN:Shr ah. Wo chay ma ni la, ni ne? (Correct. I’m in Manila, you?)
Me: Wo chay QC. Twey pu chi, wo iaw shuey chiaw lo (I’m in QC. Sorry, I have to sleep.) [Nauubusan na kasi ako ng mandarin eh.]
UN: Chwo X haw X…uan an! (XXXX, good evening!)

Whew. My elementary chinese teachers and my language teachers in Taiwan would have heart attacks if they got to hear or see the way I structured my sentences. Que horror!

I didn’t get to know if she really was one of my friends. Maybe it was a missent text by a Chinese or Taiwanese national. They’re lucky to have sent it to someone who knows very very basic caveman mandarin or hokien. (Though I really don't believe in missent texts in situations like that. It's too much of a coincidence.) But if I found out that the girl is one of my friends, I promise I’ll hunt her down.

Top Twenty Five Reasons Why I Love My Buddy Guards So Much

2005-07-27T08:09:00.000+08:00

Here's a short tribute to my guy friends, who have been putting up with my insanity for the past seven years now, and I hope (and I'm sure) they're looking forward in spending more crazy years with me. I don't know what brought about this entry. I spent some time with them over the weekend and I thought they, of all people, rightfully deserve a pseudo-altar in cyberspace on my blog. So guys, you know who you are. My heartfelt thanks!

1. They are brutally honest in their opinions.
2. They tell you when you look nice…
3. and yep, they ogle at you openly.
4. They can say really nice things about you and actually mean it…
5. and they won’t be waiting for something in return. (Well, maybe a compliment too hahaha)
6. They will fight for you until death whenever some guy hurts you in one way or another.
7. The way they’re so protective of you in everything makes you feel really loved.
8. They teach you about guy stuff that you won’t ever learn from your girl friends.
9. They eat a lot. And drink moderately and a lot. (Labo…)
10. Two of my guy friends are the authority in girl’s clothes. And they are not gay.
11. You can make them come and pick you up in your Makati office even if they’re over in Commonwealth or Antipolo if you have a plausible reason.
12. They forgive you easily for your mistakes…
13. but won’t let you get away with major ones.
14. They can pamper you and treat you like a princess (I always feel that way whenever I’m with them).
15. You can laugh at their burps and farts. (Phew!!!)
16. They teach you how to punch and kick properly so you’d know how to defend yourself.
17. You can always drag one of them in those cheesy, chick-flick kind or Tagalog movies and laugh about it after.
18. They bring you flowers or doughnuts if you drop hints heavily enough! (Hahahahaha it worked for me!)
19. They make the funniest faces in pictures.
20. They give you additional female friends in the form of their significant other…
21. and you can, together with their girlfriends, make fun of them hahahahaha Ü
22. They give very sensible advice.
23. They serve as very valuable gatekeepers and appraisers of every guy that shows interest in you.
24. They think you deserve a man who’s nothing short of perfect.
25. And they are very charming too! (*smirk*)

How I Got My Groove Back

2005-07-17T16:47:00.000+08:00

Shmooshy's back! And he's brought a new friend along. Meet my 256MB storage device, Twinky! (clap clap clap!)

In addition to this, I am reading Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince. JK Rowling's tone was very much like the one she used for the fifth book - heavy, with a tinge of melancholy air hovering throughout the pages. Sigh. Six down, one more book to wait for!

HP, Twinky and Shmooshy

The Date That Turned Out To Be Great

2005-07-16T10:36:00.000+08:00

Went out with my office girlfriends last night to watch Juan Miguel's gig over at Racks El Pueblo. 'Twas my first time to go to a 'gig' and boy oh boy, I think we would've made a very big and weird impression if we just wore our office clothes. The crowd was so young, most of them were obviously college kids. I remarked to Suave, "This is the crowd wherein they still ask their parents for gimik money..." and she affirmed with a snicker and a nod of her head.

The music was so loud, I thought my eardrums were gonna pop out of my head. Stress! Menaya played first, and they sound good. They have promise! (*Hint hint* to someone!!!) After their set, the band Hale was setting up and over the speakers came out Barry White's song "Can't Get Enough of Your Love." Me, Torpeh, Suave and Idith was bobbing our heads to the beat of the song. I remarked, "We really must be getting old...we're liking Barry White and swaying to his song!"

Hale was good, though I kept on yawning and looking at my watch. I really am getting old...'twas just 11:30pm and I was already having difficulty keeping my eyes open, considering the live music was so freakin' loud. The girls and I went out in the middle of Hale's set to get some fresh air, 'coz the cigarette fumes and the mixed odors of the people there were getting noxious. The girls were all glassy eyed, looking dreamily at Champ, Hale's lead vocalist. He's preppy, cute in a Chinese Josh Hartnett kind of way. Flashes were going off left and right and almost every girl and some guys all had their camera phones out and videoing the whole thing. I can relate. If it was Jude Law, Hayden Christensen or Orlando Bloom there I would've been dragged out by their bodyguards.

We were talking outside when Juan Miguel (yes, THE Juan Miguel of Torpeh) came out dragging (guess who?) Champ over to us. We got introduced and got to shake his hand. He seems really nice and cuter up close. I know we incurred envious looks from most of the girls there, but I guess we, or should I say I, just got lucky - it was the first time I've ever heard their songs and I already got to meet the much sought-after Champ. Lucky lucky me.

A lot of teasing went on that night, at the expense of Torpeh. Siya kasi eh. But that's gonna be another entry. For now, I'm waiting for Sir Jun B. to finish his talk so that him, Suave and I can haul our as*es over to Angeles this afternoon. I'm getting sleepy, so...

ENOUGH

2005-07-15T15:43:00.000+08:00

I have reached my boiling point right now about a certain person (let’s call him Wallace since the meaning of the name is “Stranger”). He has got to be the most frustrating guy in my life. Well, not for long now – this is the last time that I will exert any effort for him. Enough. I don’t need the stress. I don’t need the frustration in trying to second-guess whatever it is that he wants to convey. I don’t need the feeling of being unsure, of being kept hanging about something so trivial. Kinakausap ko siya ng maayos, sana naman sumagot siya ng maayos. WTF, man, all I wanted to know was if he could make it or not. Don’t you just hate it when you text someone, asking about something, say, a meeting happening on that day itself and then never getting any reply? I know I must’ve looked like a nagging moron, calling him up and texting him four times in the span of two days, but I did it just to show that I was really psyched about that meeting. Hindi pa nga makulit yon eh. Not answering my calls and texts is not the polite or manly way to say “No.” It’s the coward’s way (and no, I’m not going to apologize). You could simply send a text. Or tell me directly. Is that so hard to do? I can read a bloody text or take a bloody hint, you know.

Writing this is absolutely cathartic for me. I’ll give Wallace the satisfaction of knowing that he affected me this way if he reads this. Just this once. And never again.

To Wallace, here’s my message: Fine. I got the hint. If you’ve got any excuses, I don’t want to hear it. Now go away and leave me alone.

I don’t deserve to be treated this way. I don’t know why I’m letting him. Bloody hell. Enough is enough.

How I Led Torpeh On

2005-07-13T07:41:00.000+08:00

Yes, yes I admit it! I shamelessly led Torpeh on! I was so excited, I was on the verge of kilig. There was a lot of action going on between us as we were going home last Monday night.

Huh? No, no, I’m not promiscuous. Torpeh is a girl (look at my entry ‘Suave Line For The Week’ down there), and no, I am very confident about my uh, sexual preference. I led her on because…

Well, anyway. Let me start from the beginning. I was driving home with Torpeh when she told me that she has a lunch date for tomorrow. He was her friend’s colleague from the company Tiger Woods is endorsing (at least I think he is – they keep on mentioning something about becoming a tiger in every one of their advertisements). I asked for the guy’s name and when she gave it to me, it sounded so familiar, I was sure that this guy was my batchmate from the school on the hill that I blurted out “Cute yaaan, cute yan go go go!!!”

Of course Torpeh, being the exuberant girl that she is, was immediately caught up with my enthusiasm. “Talaga?!?!?”she said. I told her that the guy (let’s call him Joaquin Magno – what the heck do I have with regal sounding names?!?) was the crush of one of my friends before. I think.

Yeah, see, the thing was, I can’t recall the guy’s (my friend’s crush) name. I think it was as regal sounding as Joaquin Magno’s name, but I was almost sure that it was almost the same guy. Almost. My memory falters. I must be getting senile.

I told her that I don’t know if we’re talking about the same guy, but I was almost sure that we are. Then she goes, “Ayan, tuloy, na-pe-pressure na ako…”Oh dear. “Let’s just cross our fingers and pray that we’re talking about the same guy,” I remarked, showing her my crossed fingers while banging it against the steering wheel for emphasis.

“Tell you what, I’ll go check my yearbook when I get home. Picturan ko siya and then I’ll send it to you through MMS,” I said, hoping to pacify her and at the same time fervently wishing that we were correct. She was looking at me with a frown on her face. To further alleviate her worries, I stated, unhelpfully, if I may add, “Okay fine, meron siyang malaking nunal sa mukha. As in yung kalahati ng mukha niya nunal…” while dissolving into giggles.

The first thing I did when I got home was to bring out my yearbook and search for Joaquin Magno. Uh-oh…wrong guy. My friend’s crush was named Marco pala. Patay. I texted Torpeh to confirm her worries – that we were not talking about the same guy. She still want me to send her a picture, so I did. Her feedback? “Waaaaaahhh mukhang totoy!!!”

So there. That is how I lead Torpeh on. I had good intentions, really. But for once, my usually sharp memory for details failed me. Blame it on my senility.

If you wanna know what happened on the lunch date, go here.

The Hill's Survey

Got this from one of by true blue friends and he tagged me...yech...oh well

1. What's your student number? 98---1
2. Did you pass Ateneo or was waitlisted? i passed
3. How did you know your ACET (Ateneo College Entrance Exam) result? Xtian told me
4. Is Ateneo your first choice? Yep
5. What is your ACET score? No idea
6. What course was your first choice? Mgt
7. Second choice? LM
8. Are you chinito? No
9. From Ateneo high? Err…yeah =P
10. Did you enjoy you orsem (orientation seminar)? Yep
11. What gate did you use on your first day? Gate 3
12. Did you live in a dorm? No
13. Did you ever get an "F"? no
14. How about an "A"? yes
15. Highest grade? A
16. Lowest? D
17. Worst experience in admu: lottery for registration. Try going to school around three am and you’ll see what I mean.
18. Did you always attend your classes? Yep
19. On scholarship? No
20. Did you dream of being "laude?" laude lang
21. When did you graduate? 2002
22. Fave teacher? Manny Dy and Tina Astorga
23. Worst teacher? Antonia Santos
24. Fave subject/s? Our core curriculum (philo, theo, socio, eco) and english literature
25. Worst subject? History 166
26. Favorite landmark in admu? Bel field
27. Building? Rizal lib
28. fave eating place? Caf, manang’s and the whole katipunan strip
29. Did you pay student rates in jeepneys? No
30. Are you always at the Rizal lib? Only to sleep and to cram for orals.
31. Ever gone to the infirmary? Once
32. Any crush on campus? A lot!
33. Girlfriend? Haha lots
34. Any plans to get a master's or a Ph. D.? in the future
35. What were your PE subjects? Ballroom dancing, fitness walking (duh?) and taekwondo
36. How was your block ? oh my…don’t get me started…they’re the best!
37. Ever watched a graduation? Yup
38. Memorized "Song for Mary?" oh yeah definitely
39. Memorized "Fabilioh?" no. what’s fabilioh?
40. How about "Halikinu?" oooohhhh. No.
41. How about "Blue Eagle Spelling?" yep
42. Are you a member of Team Ateneo? No
43. Who were your favorite UAAP basketball players? Tenorio!!!
44. Ever got "perfect" in an exam? Yep
45. What do you hate most about hell week? The wait
46. Did you learn how to smoke and drink there? No
47. What did you like about our school? Everything
48. What didn't you like? Parking and the lady guard sa lib
49. Bought anything in the A-shop? Yep
50. Did you look good in your ID pic? Ugh no
51. Did anything illegal inside the campus? U mean aside from sleeping at the lib for 5 hours?
52. Bought anything in National katips? Yup
53. Have you been to Starbucks katips? Yeah ewww
54. Want to study again? yep

Fifteen Pick Up lines

2005-07-07T08:13:00.000+08:00

Pick up lines. Why would anyone ever want to use pick up lines, anyway? I admit, some of them work if they’re real or witty enough, but do guys really have to use them? Most of them drive me to have fits of laughter which, of course, would embarrass the guys dropping them. Part of the embarrassment is my fault, I know. But hello, most girls don’t want to hear pick up lines. They’re so lame. It would be better off if guys just get it real and go straight to the point.

I’ve compiled some pick up lines that my friends and I had the fortunate (or unfortunate) opportunity to hear. I’m sure you can find it on the Internet also; for all we know it was there where the guys got it in the first place. I think we were lucky enough to merit the interest of pretty decent guys. Hehehe.

1. Hey, wanna get lucky? (No.)
2. Are you lost ma'am? Because heaven's a long way from here. (Uh….)
3. Did it hurt? Girl: Did what hurt? Guy: When you fell out of heaven? (Cheesy…)
4. Hello, I'm a thief, and I'm here to steal your heart. (Pwedeng pumasa…)
5. I'm sorry, were you talking to me? Girl: No. Guy: Well then, please start. (Yabang mo, ‘tol!)
6. Hi, the voices in my head told me to come over and talk to you. (Get away from me you schizo!)
7. Hi. Are you cute?
8. I bet you P50 you're gonna turn me down.
9. You see my friend over there? [Point to friend who sheepishly waves from afar] He wants to know if YOU think I'M cute.
10. Hi. I'm gay, think you can convert me? (Panalo!)
11. Do you have a boyfriend? No. Want one? (Can you guess to whom this was said to?)
12. Hi. Wanna dance?
13. What's a nice girl like you doing in a place like this?
14. Wow. (This is very effective. So simple! I don’t know what’s up with guys and the sun moon stars or whatever…)
15. (My favorite from the French duude!) Hi, do you know how much an average penguin weighs? Girl: No Guy: Just enough to break the ice, hi, I’m ______.

Effectiveness of these pick-up lines are not guaranteed. It has to have the right place, right time and the right delivery. BUT, you can almost always get the name of the girl you’re eyeing (provided that she isn’t attached or don’t have overprotective male friends around) since we, as a courtesy and sign of uh, respect to the guts you’ve shown in approaching us, are obliged to smile and say hi at the very least. Just hope that the names you’ve been given are real.

Suave Line For The Week

2005-07-05T09:41:00.000+08:00

You have to know the context where the line was said. It was delivered by one of my girlfriends, whom I shall refer to as Torpeh. Here goes!

Torpeh was in the car with Juan Miguel at Greenbelt 3 parking lot last Sunday. They’ve just finished their date and was talking about their…uh…relationship (or whatever you call it. Labo eh.)

Juan Miguel reached out and grasped Torpeh’s hand. And then he brought it to his lips and kissed it. Torpeh looked at him and remarked, “Alam mo, wala diyan yung bibig ko. Nandito,” while pointing to her lips.

Juan Miguel didn’t know what to expect. Was she joking? He didn’t know what to do – to laugh perhaps? Or take her up on her offer?

Torpeh, sensing Juan Miguel’s confusion, repeated her statement. “Hindi nga. Wala diyan yung bibig ko. Nandito.” And so it was.

Torpeng-torpe nga siya. Hwahahahahaha. =D

PS. Juan Miguel got into a minor car accident after their date. Hmm...I wonder why???

Thirty five random things about me - issue #1

2005-06-30T08:00:00.000+08:00

1. I’m not as innocent as you think I am.
2. I hate DOMs. And guys who act like one.
3. I love ChocNut.
4. Sushi is a snack.
5. I’m deathly afraid of rodents.
6. I love to dance alone in my room.
7. I wish Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie were together in real life.
8. I don’t like Jennifer Aniston.
9. Retail therapy is the medicine I’m always willing to take.
10. Procrastinating is one of the things I’m good at.
11. I remember birthdays and car plate numbers.
12. I am a closet boyband fanatic.
13. Lancome is the only brand of foundation I prefer smothering on my face. It’s the only brand I’m not allergic to. All the others make my face blotchy in a couple of hours.
14. I shop for make-up once every two years.
15. I pray everyday.
16. My left eye’s grade is 775, my right eye is 800 (or vice versa).
17. My hair is a big house of split ends.
18. I wear fake pearl earrings because my mum won’t let me wear real ones (legend says if single women wore pearl earrings they’d be old maids. Whatevah.).
19. I have six credit cards. Thankfully I don’t use all of them.
20. My average number of hours of sleep is only 5.
21. I drink Milo freeze almost every morning.
22. Chocolate is a food group.
23. Mango is both a fruit and a store.
24. I hate people who cut in front of me (or other people) whenever I’m lined up. Why can’t they line up like everybody else?
25. I hate drivers who do not use their signals when they’re trying to make singit.
26. The MRT is one heck of an invention made by man. So is the bullet train, the underwater rails, and the MTR.
27. I like to read Isabel Allende and Gabriel Garcia Marquez’s books with a dictionary right beside me.
28. If I send an email without anything on it, it’s all that darned Watson’s fault, ok???
29. I avoid alcoholic and carbonated drinks like the plague.
30. Isaw, fishballs and kwek-kwek are three of the Pinoy’s ingenious ways to fend off starvation (damn delicious, too).
31. My stockings have an average lifespan of 2 days (no distinction between the cheap and the expensive ones).
32. I have a thing for day old stubble in guys.
33. I hate totalitarian regimes.
34. I love kids. No, seriously, I do.
35. I’m giving dating a chance. (Takers, anyone? Ü)

Inside Your Heaven by Carrie Underwood

2005-06-26T11:52:00.000+08:00

Another must-play at my wedding: Carrie Underwood's Inside Your Heaven

I've been down, now I'm blessed
I felt a revelation comin' around
I guess it's right, it's so amazing
Everytime I see you I'm alive
You're all I've got, you lift me up
The sun and the moonlight
All my dreams are in your eyes

And I wanna be inside your heaven
Take me to the place you cry from
Where the storm blows you away
I wanna be the earth that holds you
Every bit of air your breathing in
A soothing wind, I wanna be inside your heaven

When we touch, when we love
The stars line up, the wrong becomes undone
Naturally my soul surrenders
The sun and the moonlight
All my dreams are in your eyes

And I wanna be inside your heaven
Take me to the place you cry from
Where the storm blows you away
I wanna be the earth that holds you
Every bit of air you're breathing in
A soothing wind, I wanna be inside your heaven

When minutes turn to day and years
If mountains fall, I'll still be here
Holding you until the day I die

And I wanna be inside your heaven
Take me to the place you cry from
Where the storm blows you away

And I wanna be inside your heaven
Take me to the place you cry from
Where the storm blows you away

And I wanna be inside your heaven
Take me the place you cry from
Where the storm blows you away

I wanna be the earth that holds you
Every bit of air you're breathing in
A soothing wind
I wanna be inside your heaven

Oh yes I do
I wanna be inside your heaven

Technologically Impaired

2005-06-26T11:08:00.000+08:00

Shmooshy has to *bawl* undergo surgery!!! It'll be away from me for almost a month! Waaaaahhhh! Shmooshy had to go back to Singapore because some guy in the Creative Team Support unknowingly made me erase its firmware. Grrrrr...I was so upset last night because of that. Aren't technical support people supposed to help you fix things, not aggravate them? I emailed him so many times that Shmooshy can't be read by E----- G-------. All I want was a problem for that, but noooo, he had to make me download all kinds of stuff, install, uninstall and reinstall softwares, erase firmware to fix Shmooshy but to no avail. Sigh. Nakakainis.

My loveable Shmooshy

I listen to Shmooshy every single day, it helps me pass the time, it helps me not lose track of my groove. And now, it had to be away from me for three whole weeks!!! I didn't want the Creative Service Center here to touch it, because the warranty can be made void since Shmooshy was bought in Singapore.

And now I have just found out that my dear brother is taking away E----- G------- and Spiff with him to Japan for three months! Waaaaaaahhhhh!!! How can I function normally without three of my beloved techie pets??? How, how how??? The horror, the horror!!! I guess it's back to the caveman era for me. Thank goodness for my phone, also named E----- G-------, who can temporarily replace Shmooshy and Spiff for while. I'll miss them. Come back quickly, my beloved pets!!! Please!!! Your mummy's missing you already!

Queer Eye for the Gay Guy

2005-06-20T20:39:00.000+08:00

I saw him first as he was being introduced to the Jap Cook, Max Brenner and Spiderman. I thought, “Hmm…what a gorgeous face!” He was sporting an F4 haircut. Hmm, pwede na. Then the outfit…oh dear, oh dear, oh dear. He looked like a dancing instructor. He was wearing a long-sleeved polo shirt tucked into his black pants, with the buttons unbuttoned from the top until the middle of his chest. Sablay! Sayang!

Then last Saturday, at our company sportsfest, he had his hair cut short and dyed at the ends. Hmm, bagay. So far so good. He was wearing a fitted sleeveless shirt and black jogging pants. Ok, sige, mukhang papasa. When he walked, when he moved…sige na nga, effeminate ng konti, just don’t loose it completely. Was he going to be my eye candy permanently?

Dyaran-dyaraaaaan!!! It was their team’s turn to show their stuff for the cheerdancing competition. Everything was going well until…shake, body-body-dancer! AAArrrggghhhhhh, oh my dear, para siyang kiti-kiti sumayaw. Is it just me or is it my taste in men beginning to get, ahh, questionable?

Of Marriage and Banking Awards

2005-06-19T21:24:00.000+08:00

Mabel got married last Wednesday. I was teary-eyed when she was walking down the aisle to the song of "Ikaw." Haaaay...weddings do bring out my softie side, and makes me wonder when the heck is gonna be my turn to walk down that dreaded (or anticipated) aisle.

My bouquet of flowers

On to other things...
One of my products won an international award! Woohooo! I attended the awards night cum gala dinner with my bank's bigwigs. Since the news embargo period already passed, I can post an event picture here already.

Too bad my boss couldn't make it since he was tied up with another event at Tagaytay. I would've wanted him to be there as well.

I can't believe the things that are happening to me. I feel so much blessed. Thank You, thank You, thank You, Lord.

Red Faced Diary - Entry No. 1

2005-06-10T11:42:00.000+08:00

One day, Fableeng was doing her day to day activities when she decided to listen to Shmooshy. She got it out, plugged in and put on her earphones and chose a song she hasn’t heard in a long time. She hummed softly with the song while computing figures for the Japanese Cook. She started singing along during the refrain and belted her heart out when the chorus came, singing, “Balutin mo ako sa hiwaga ng…”

And then everything stopped.

Fableeng turn her head ever so slowly to her left, then her front. She saw three of her colleagues smiling crazily. She quickly pulled down her earphones and looked back. Everyone was standing or craning their necks, giggling. Max Brenner came out and said, “Ge-grade-an na kita eh, yung parang sa sing-along…”

A memoir of a red-faced Fableeng. It really had to be Bituing Walang Ningning, right? Blast it.

Ten Songs That Have To Be Played In My Wedding

2005-06-06T07:43:00.000+08:00

One of my friends is going to marry next week, and I'm feeling very sentimental. I haven't found the man of my dreams yet, but I've got my songs already lined up.

1. Once In A Lifetime (Kenny Loggins feat. Human Nature): This is going to be the song on our music video Ü

2. Only Hope (Switchfoot): As I'm walking down the aisle

3. Crazy For You (Madonna)

4. Angels Brought Me Here (Guy Sebastian or Carrie Underwood)

5. Ngayon at Kailanman (George Canseco/Basil Valdez): a must play at any Filipino wedding

6. Kailangan Kita (Gary V.)

7. The Prayer

8. You Raise Me Up

9. Ikaw Lamang

10. Ikaw

Darn. Ang daming langgam!!!

Max Brenner

2005-06-03T22:24:00.000+08:00

It was an ordinary weekday morning last Thursday. Nothing was amiss. My boss, whom we fondly call Max Brenner, wasn't in yet. VPs were usually late, anyway. I went about my tasks and was talking to someone over the phone when he came in and called in an emergency marketing meeting at our conference room. This often happens, so I went immediately, expecting that we'd have to rush some project or Oli needs backup for her event today. He waited until we were complete, and somebody started joking about how his daughter was being linked to various actors on TV. He took it good-naturedly, even laughing with us, and then he dropped the bomb.

Max Brenner is leaving. He's leaving us. He told us, "Guys, I have to make an announcement. One month from now, I'll be leaving and someone is going to take my place..." in his usual way.

There was one millisecond of silence that reverberated with shock and then I, being the more outspoken and the most talkative one in the group, blurted out loudly, "You HAVE GOT to be kidding me..." I heard Oli say "WHA..???" and C remakred softly, "Ang daya ni (Max Brenner)..." I was on the verge of tears. I was trying very hard not to let my tears fall. After our initial outbursts, he continued, explaining the reason why he was leaving, why he has to leave, dadada, dadada. And all that time I was blinking back my tears, trying to control my facial expression, not looking at him. After he trailed off, I looked at him and spoke, in a strangled voice, "You know, you're going to make me cry..." And I broke down. He said, "Nooo..."

I continued, "You know it takes a lot to make me cry. My friends, they can attest to this. I never cried about work, about my studies, about stress, but this..." And then everyone broke down.

That moment I had my first experience in feeling devastated. My tears fell continually and I was having difficulty in uttering my words. I feel so sad.

Max Brenner is a great boss. Seriously. He is a good mentor, a good leader. He is unbelievably patient with us (although we know sometimes he gets frustrated with us). He works with a personal touch, he has a great sense of humor, he befriends anybody who comes his way, he...well, you get the idea. Words cannot do justice in describing the kind of boss that he is, but he is great. I was so thankful to God because He gave me bosses like Max Brenner and the Jap Cook. I couldn't have asked for better bosses than those two, especially now since I am just really getting started on letting my career sail. Before we were assigned to departments after our training program, I prayed real hard that God give me a boss that I could look up to, I could admire, I could respect, I could candidly speak to, someone who's gonna be a role model that I could pattern my work values and leadership style after. He answered my prayers with Jap Cook and Max Brenner.

I worked closely with Max Brenner since Lola left. He was the one who trained me not to let titles get in the way of communication and getting things done, of properly complimenting efforts that are note-worthy, dispensing insightful views every step of the way. He guided me in every step while letting me have free reign. He backed my decisions, challenged my ideas and limits and taught me to stand up for something that I believe is good and will work for the company even if the godfather didn't like it. Little did I know that he was already preparing me for his imminent departure.

I know Sig and Oli feel exactly the same way. We were, are, devastated. Oli told him, "Eunice and I were talking a few weeks before, that one of the reasons why we are staying with this unit is because of you, and now you're leaving...?" I know we're making it really hard for him, but we can't help it. We love our boss. We love the Jap Cook and Max Brenner. It has always been evident in the way that we talk about those two. We feel offended if some higher ups speak or backstab or yell at them in any way. We're very 'protective' of them. How many can say the same thing about their bosses?

I know it will be really hard to let him go. I don't even want to think about it yet. I act as if he's not going, barging in every now and then at his office. But at least I can kid about his departure now, like he does. He somehow makes it easier for us to deal with it. And he's pretty decided himself. Maluwag sa loob niya. And I guess life's just like that. Some people come and go. Max Brenner is one of those people I had to meet to give me a lesson, and the lesson's been given. It's finished. I learned and am learning so much from him still. It's time to move on. But I'd like to hold on just a little bit longer.

Fleeting thoughts

2005-06-01T08:20:00.000+08:00

It’s nice to stay in a first class hotel suite while traveling.

The view from the top is absolutely spectacular.

Manila is beautiful at night.

I am overeating again.

Mabelle’s getting married on the 15th.

I’m listening to Blue’s “Don’t Treat Me Like A Fool.” Hmm, how very apt.

My line for the week (to Jerome): “I know you have fantasies of lasciviousness…”

I want to watch “A Lot Like Love.”

Chad Michael Murray is sizzling HOT. Watching House of Wax is worth every penny, if only to see Paris Hilton get killed.

My dad took all my Chicharritos chicharon to Singapore. I didn't even see them. Takaw talaga.

I have a craving for UP’s isaw (the one that’s sold outside the International Center).

“We’re being summoned by the godfather” (of our so-called ‘mafia’). – Oli (enclosed words mine)

Jenny’s burned out.

Jae’s coming to Manila this week.

I’m in dire need of a long, soothing massage.

My dad gave my mum a diamond trilogy ring for their 24th wedding anniversary.

I love Jordi Labanda’s illustrations.

I’m feeling uncertain about my future.

B's eldest daughter once remarked, "Dad, where can I find true love? I wanna find true love..." She was only seventeen.

I want to go shopping this weekend.

Loalde has such nice clothes.

Creative came out with Zen Neeon, which is Shmooshy’s cousin. It has a 5GB memory and standard black casing. Comes in ten different colors and four different backlights, and an option in changing its skin (reminds me of Nokia’s X-press On Color Covers). It has a non-removable battery, though. Bummer.

I’m feeling dizzy again @c@ so I’m signing off for now. Peace out!

I Feel Sick

2005-05-29T17:54:00.000+08:00

I feel bloody sick right now. My joints are aching, my tummy's hurting. I'm feeling dizzy @c@. I wanna throw up. I must be overworked and over stressed. Bloody hell.

Lands of Dried Mangoes and Pomelos

2005-05-22T17:51:00.000+08:00

I went to Cebu last Thursday to present my newest baby and our new business proposition to our BMs and the ABM of Visayas. The flight was quite uneventful, I only had a near-mishap when I couldn't recall the directions to our Cebu Area Office. I said to the cabbie, "Kuya, basta po 'yung (Bank name) sa may Osmena Blvd., yng papuntang Colon...pasensiya na po kasi po alam ko naman talaga kung saan yun, yun nga lang kasi hindi ko alam yung papunta ron kasi hindi naman po ako taga rito..." Thank goodness I had a good cabbie. He didn't even charge me the full rate from the airport to any point in Cebu City (which was about P250). He was charging me only about P175, and since I was feeling generous I gave him P200.
Our lunch was great! My favorite viand was pork and bananas with caramelized sauce. I asked Ms. Lanie the name of the viand, and of course I forgot its name as I am writing this now. Add to that the fact that I left Spiff in Manila, and I was two steps away of feeling like a complete ditz on my first day out. I lost too many great photo ops. Nakakainis. The view from the air was absolutely fantastic, I nearly broke the rule about not opening handphones inside an aircraft, since the camera I had was on my phone. Hayop talaga ang 'Pinas. I just can't understand why majority of the Filipinos want to leave this country. I really don't get it.

As my plane was touching down on Mactan, I was enthralled at Cebu's beautiful shoreline. It had underwater marshes that looked like submerged islands that even had canals going through it. Ay nako, basta. Nakakabuwisit.

They took us out on Ayala Center Cebu to go window shopping, and we saw this really cute, miniature scooter that seemed to be made for kids. Ang cute talaga, pramis. Kulay red pa. And then we walked around the mall. Yung shop na Loalde pala sa Cebu nag-originate, and there I was thinking that it was an international brand! Haha, Go Pinoy! Their clothes are cool. I bought a shirt from another store called USA Sports, and I think that it will become one of my favorite shirts. It's white and has a small, simple logo in front. At the back there's a phrase that I know most gals will love, in BIG LETTERS pa: GIRLS KICK BUTT! I'm gonna wear the shirt sa gym for body combat. Hehehe.

Davao was great! My boss and I visited three of our four Davao branches after we ate a sumptuous buffet lunch in...shucks, was it Aling Neneng's? Or simply Neneng's? Ang lakas ko talaga kumain, seryoso. Sa sobrang sarap ng mga pagkain sa probinsiya nakakalimutan ko yung tawag sa pagkain nila saka yung mga kinakainan namin. Ayan, kasi...katakawan! It doesn't show in my body nonetheless. Wehehehehehe.

For dinner in Davao, we went to a place called Suka at Sili (Vinegar and Chili), which turned out to be owned by the sister of Jaypee, my college mate. And, as usual, sa mga matakaw na katulad ko, everything was delicious. I ate kuhol, well, actually it was suso, but everybody's calling it kuhol. It looks like a green worm once you've sucked it out of its shell (and I found out that I was a good sucker. Wahahahahahah *evil grin*) I ate about a dozen of them. Then there was the tuna sisig that was so salty, the bulalo, the kilawin ( which I didn't eat because I don't like the stuff) and...dyaran-dyaraaaaaan...the crispy tuna tail. Oooohhhh, gastronomic delights. The tuna tail is infinitely better-tasting than crispy pata and it's healthier, too. And then there was also called the bulubol, which is essentially fish fat. It's the counterpart of the liempo's fat, and again, it's better for our health as well.

After dinner, my boss and I went back to the hotel lugging three cases of pomelos which Ms. Jean absolutely refused to let us pay for. I kidded her, "Naku, ma'am, baka hindi na ako payagang pumunta ng Davao ng mama ko kapag nalaman niyang di ko to binayaran...sige na, pumunta pa nga po siya sa room ko sa Cebu para lang ibigay yung pambili niyan, sayang naman yung pagod niya pag di niyo tanggapin..." (Yup, my mum went to Cebu as well, but she left a day earlier than I did, so we weren't able to share a room. Whew!) But of course, it was all futile. You gotta love Davao's hospitality =).

Of course, since Jaypee was already based in Davao, he took me out on its finest bars and resto after I finished watching the last episode of Hiram. First we picked up Chard, his friend and then went to BluGre, Starbucks' counterpart in Davao (Cebu has Bo's Coffee Club) where I got to meet two of his female friends, Caca and Lyn. Jaypee introduced me as his girl kabarkada with balls, hahaha, eh sino kayang nagturo/nag-expose sa akin sa lahat ng kabastusan at kabulastugan??? Yep, that's what I got for hanging around Gabs, Jaypee, Jayvee, Jae and Law. But they're really nice, seryoso. They're just...horny most of the time. So what I know about green-mindedness all came from those five guys. Oh, yeah, I can't leave Rosei out, so that makes them six teachers, majority of them, I believe, only taught me theoretical knowledge. Hahahahahahahahahahahahaha!

We went to Pop's first, and upon entering I noticed a guy who was the spitting image of Marc Nelson. Since Jaypee knew the people the guy was with, he got introduced to him. Me, I just smiled and stared straight ahead (haha, lumabas ang pagka mahiyain ko). After we left, I asked Jayps if the guy was indeed Marc Nelson. He replied, "No the guy's name was Don." Oh, false alarm, then. We went over to Caca, Lyn and Chard's table and I asked Caca, "Hey, the guys back there looks like Marc Nelson." Caca replied, "Dear, I think that's really Marc Nelson..." I turned back to Jaypee and said, "Jayps, ano ka ba, si Marc Nelson kaya yon..." To which Jaypee replied, "Well, akala ko Don yung pangalan niya eh, saka hindi ko naman kilala yun, lalaki yun eh..." Hay nako, typical guy reply. Of course, Jaypee served me two glasses of hard drinks that he conveniently, or rather, intentionally forgot to tell me the contents thereof. Afterwards we went to Liquid at the Apo View, and Jaypee gave me a third glass of who knows what, which I drank with difficulty already. After a few minutes the alcohol was rocking my world and voila, it was time to go to the bathroom for me. Ick. I'm never trusting Jaypee again, hwahahahaha Ü

ang Fanget ng Host, Mare! (I can’t think of better words to describe it)

2005-05-13T08:02:00.000+08:00

My colleagues and I went to FHM’s victory party last night. It was by invitation only, because Pao said they wanted to keep the jologs people out (Huh? So I can’t bring in half of my personality then?). He managed to snag some invites from his friend and Oli, Jody and I picked out our free magazines before heading for NBC Tent’s entrance. Pao, upon seeing the mags that we picked out, asked why didn’t we get the free FHM magazines (we picked out a gadget and a car magazine). I gave him a weird look and said, “What would I ever do with an FHM magazine?” Gadgets and cars are so much more exciting than semi-naked women in my opinion.

We milled for about a few minutes before heading inside the tent. Upon entering I decided I already wanted to go home because it was so packed! I didn’t want to smell the mixed odors of body sweat (Ick. Sorry guys, we girls may sweat more than you do, but at least we smell nice while sweating. Half of you smell horrible when you sweat. Haha, ang arte ko no?) Turns out, it was just the entrance that was so full of people. Once we navigated our way towards the stage, the crowd thinned a bit. At least I can still feel the air conditioning. There was a band playing rock music, and then after a couple of songs, Aubrey Miles opened the show with a dance number wherein she was a butterfly, complete with harness and wings. I know how to appreciate the female body; her legs are so to die for. Grabe. Guys around me were either hooting or staring transfixed on that writhing body of hers on stage. After Aubrey’s number came the reason why last night was so fun and so bad at the same time.

Nothing could have prepared me for THAT VOICE. How shall I describe that voice? It was very loud, it was whiny! Yes, yes, whiny was the word. I don’t want to use the overused “fingernails on a chalkboard” description because it was worse than that. Asia Agcaoili(?) was the owner of that whiny voice. She was such a lousy emcee, Jody and I were making fun of her three-fourths of the time we were there. And the crowd seemed to think so too, because they were not as responsive as they should be. Even her skimpy outfit and all that splaying her legs wide in front of a huge male audience didn’t help salvage her lousiness in emceeing. Ang sagwa talaga. A guy even hollered “You’re a wh*re!” (that’s mean!).

Quotable quotes include her screaming “EF-EYCH-EM’s WAN HANDRED SEKSIYEST FIMEYLS, PI-LI-PI-NO BERSHONNNN!” every time she introduced the various batches of females; “YU NOOOUUU…” (You know…) “Thank you for voting us” from one participant, “WEYL…” (Well) I think Asia was trying hard on having an Ah-mey-ri-can accent, a certain “TWEYNG” (twang) and she failed miserably.

“Her accent sounds so…so…ahhh…vulgar, it’s not refined…” I told Jody.
With a semi-hurt and a puppy dog look in her face, and mirth twinkling in her eyes, she replied, “Uy, wag kang ganyan. Taga-UP yan…” Seconds later, we dissolved into giggles.
I was shocked. “WHAAAAT? UP people don’t talk like that!” The ones I know don’t, anyway. I guess UP does have a wide diversity of people.
She continued, “Ikinahihiya ko na taga UP siya…” Yup yup I totally understand. Sometimes I feel that way about Kris Aquino, hehehe. And it’s not as if Ateneo doesn’t have people like Asia as well.

Chicago’s “He Had It Coming” was completely slaughtered by those sexy star wannabes. I can’t recall their names but man, Renee and Catherine would’ve had heart attacks if they saw that frightful rendition. Eww. There was a nearly scandalous close up of Belinda Bright’s crotch on the two big-screen TVs found on both edges of the stage when she performed a slow-moving helicopter dance step. The other girls who performed were Francine Prieto, Jenny Hernandez, ahm…Sheree, the Viva hotbabes, ahmm….basta a lot of sexy stars who weren’t really dancing (man, they can’t dance to save their lives) but rather slinking, shaking their booty and showing their cleavage on stage in their oh-so-skimpy outfits. And the men were wild. As expected. But I’m betting they weren’t as wild as last year’s event, according to Pao. There was something flat about the whole production, and it’s partly because of that lousy emcee. Hay. But I enjoyed (dissing) the event. Seriously Ü

Sexiness doesn’t have to mean baring your body for the world to see. It can be something small like the way you eat strawberries, for example. I think sexiness is best conveyed if it is unconscious, or leaves a lot to the imagination. But I guess the males just wanted to get a live glimpse of the bodies they have been fantasizing for so long now. Lust and testosterone were spinning wildly about last night. But it was flat. It wasn’t…alive.

We didn’t finish the party because we were too hot and too tired from all that standing. We left when the fashion show came about. And that’s that.

2005-05-10T21:31:00.000+08:00

I may not be able to take my vacation this July! Bummer bummer bummer. I guess that's the price I have to pay for having a job like mine. I do enjoy it, really. It's just that sometimes, I feel like I'm on the verge of a full-blown burn out. Add to that my unfinished business with you-know-who (yeah, I'm talking about Voldemort) and I'm an inch away from bawling my heart out. I haven't cried in such a long, long time, the last tear fest was in my college grad rites back in 2002. I was near tears during my friend Tin's wedding, but that doesn't count. I've just realized that I have been blessed to have not encountered anything hurtful during the past three years that reduced me to tears, and the lists below are mainly the reasons why.

Whenever I feel out of sorts, I always remember my favorite things. And then I get reminded that life is not so bad after all.

These are a few of my favorite (material) things…they make my life easier.

1. My Bible. The only book I turn to whenever I’m confused. I will make more time to read it.
2. Pieces of jewelry: My watch, given to me by my mum, earrings from my parents for my college grad, and three rings: a diamond with a platinum band from my dad, a silver ring with two dolphins on both ends, and another silver belt-ring.
3. Food: Sushi, Isaw, Chocolates, ChocNut, freshly squeezed juices. Oh, and anything that’s libre. Hahaha.
4. My books – too many to mention
5. My gadgets: Shmooshy, E----- Gorgeous 1 n 2, Spiff
6. A black Esprit pencil case given to me by Marjo on my 18th birthday. I still use it up to now Ü
7. The MRT. How do I love thee? Let me count the ways. I love the way you bring me from North Edsa to Makati in a mere 30 mins on a Monday rush hour morning. I love the way you breeze past the traffic jam along EDSA on the way home. Mwahahahahaha.
8. My deep pink Nike flip flops. The one reason why I don’t have varicose veins from those high heels I wear at the office.
9. My concealer. Effectively conceals what I want to conceal.
10. The gorgeous bronze bag my officemates gave me for my last birthday.

And these are just the material things that I put value to.

My favorite people in no particular order: (watch out for these people. They could easily steal your heart and never give it back to you)

1. My family. They drive me crazy, but so what?
2. Law. One of the few who could knock some sense into me even as I frustrate him into oblivion. But he loves me anyway.
3. Jae. My stress and shock absorber, probably the most patient guy in the whole wide world. I miss this guy big time =(
4. Marjorie – I really, really miss this girl so much. I shall call her at once!
5. Loren – hhhaaaaaa girl, where are you??? Come back here already!!! Leave those gorgeous Chinese guys and the snow in China and haul your butt here next to mine! =(
6. Jo and Cris! Loveliest girls I’ve ever met.
7. Minette and Jayvee Reyes. Minette: Homely girl-next-door type, really gorgeous, and generously feeds me whenever I’m over at her house. Jayvee: Panalo ka sa mga hirit, chief! (I put them together coz they're married! Nah, they just share the same surname and birthday. Hihihihihi.)
8. My high school clique (naks, clique daw kami) Cristina, Jack, Sally, Abigail, Minnie and Jacq. We met in 1994, gosh, it’s been a decade, girls! Cheers!
9. My co-BMP trainees (Oli, Jen, Jody, Sigrid, Jane, Anne, Alona, Olive, Brad, Bart, Dan, Andrew, Jerome, Ben, JJ, Ryan, Erick and William): we may have factions and whatnot, but heck, I’d never want you any other way. To the girls: You have been really great. To the guys: Uhm...peace na tayo? Hihihihihihi.
10. Jonas: a recent addition. Twin brother of Jae, one of the most sensible people I know. He’s crazy, too.
11. I just have to add these two: Jenny and Carlo. Wonderful, wonderful people from my former office. They're usually the first ones to bear the brunt of my rants. Jenny is always thoughtful, Carlo always has a lazy drawl in his voice.

I have so many things to be grateful for. I haven't even put up one fourth of my gratitude list yet! Haaa, life's so beautiful!!! See, I'm chipper already!

Honesty

2005-05-10T21:20:00.000+08:00

Being honest makes things so much easier. You don't have to remember the lies you've told, and to whom you've told them to. You carry less emotional baggage, you have a clean conscience. Telling the truth may be painful, but it can be very liberating at the same time.

This is me, pissed off, my raw emotions at its purest. Why the intro on honesty, you ask? I was, am disappointed with one of my uh, so-called friends. I found out today that he (yes, it's a he) lied about one tiny, insignificant thing. You may think I am blowing this out of proportion, but hear me out. The fact that he had to lie about such a tiny little thing just got to me. I mean, why lie about a trivial thing? I thought he was beyond all of it, I thought he was mature enough not to play games like that, that he was man enough to tell the truth. But I was dead wrong. So dead wrong. I had a hunch that he was doing that for some time now. In fact, I was really disappointed because I can't even count on the very foundation of our 'friendship'. I am seriously doubting if there was a true friendship in the first place. You can't have the basis of a friendship founded on lies. Maybe it's the fact that I got used to my friends who were telling the truth all the time. I kid you not. I have an amazing set of friends who rarely lies, heck, I can't even recall a lie that they've uttered. Insults, yes, but lies? No, I don't think so.

I made a vow before that I would always strive for the truth in every aspect of my life - especially in uttered words, because it can be easily corrupted. I find no sense in lying - there's a difference in keeping quiet, and withholding the truth, but that's another story. I do struggle once in a while. It's painful at first, the adherence to the truth, but once you get used to it, it becomes easier and it becomes almost second nature. In the book "A Road Less Travelled" by M. Scott Peck, the hardest part in the principle of discipline is the adherence to the truth in all aspects. Arrrgghh. I can't remember everything that I've read, I'm in too much emotional stress right now.

I called up Law and ranted. He remarked, "You know, that guy's making you jaded." I agree. How could he, how could he?

It's been so hard for me to learn to let go of things and people that are not worth my time. I have given that friend so many chances to redeem himself in my eyes, but bloody hell, he just keeps on scr*wing up.

I just need to let it go. Have it his way. I have to forgive myself for my stupidity in thinking, maybe this time he'll tell the truth. Ahhh, blast it.

A Delayed Tribute to My Mum

2005-05-09T20:26:00.000+08:00

Last Sunday was Mother's Day. I didn't buy my mum any fancy thing for the sole reason that I cannot afford any material thing she has her eyes on at present. I know of a few of her woman heart desires - mostly jewels, which she claims she'll pass on to me when the right time came. What I did instead, in lieu of any material gift, was the comfort of my presence in her bed for two nights in a row, three, if I do it again tonight. Yes, I still sleep beside my mum, although as I grew up I spent less time sleeping beside her and more time sleeping by myself in my queen- sized bed.

I don't have any idea how lonely it was to sleep in such a big bed, since I have always been alone. But my mum's situation is different. She has a husband who cannot be with her, a dad who cannot be with us because they wanted their children to live a very comfortable life. They have given me everything that I could ever want. All I have to do is ask, and they almost trip over themselves, scurrying over to grant my wish. My dad was the provider, my mum the implementer. Only she would have the patience to wait up for me until the wee hours of the morning, because mums are just like that - they couldn't possibly sleep knowing that their brood is not yet complete. It's only now, when I turned twenty three and my younger brother turned twenty one did she manage to fall asleep even if we're not home yet, but I'll bet my whole ass that she knows what forsaken hour my bro and I come home whenever we go out. I have led an easy life because of her, and for that I am very grateful.

For mum's day I bought her two atrociously expensive cream puffs she loves so much - Beard Papa, it was called, made from Japan's finest ingredients. It's a very small price to pay for everything she has done for me. I have a lot of friends who tell me I am so darned lucky to have parents like them. And I agree.

I believe they have done their utmost in raising my brother and I to a very comfortable life. They have raised me well. I believe my parents, especially my mum, swell with pride whenever they hear their friends comments, and my guy friends' observations about me (well, maybe not the mataray part). And they should. It was partly because of them I am this way. Although both mum and dad have been hinting (more frequently, if I may add) that they wouldn't mind at all if one of these days I let them meet a delightful young man...(ha. In your dreams! Hehehehe)

I WANT A HOLIDAY!!!! VACATION!!! WHATEVER! JUST GET ME AWAY FROM WORK!

2005-05-05T08:01:00.001+08:00

I really, really want a loooonnnng holiday for myself. Long, like a month off from work (fat chance of that happening! Especially after this week's developments!) My body is nearly screaming for the beach and Orchard Road.

What I really want to do for the rest of my life is travel and see the world. If I had unlimited income, I would be happily living in some hut by the beach in Morocco, then in a quaint town in Stratford-upon-Avon, and then in a condo in Manhattan, and then...well, you get the idea. There's so much diversity found in the world today, and I am hungry for all that knowledge. I always tell my friends that my dream job was to be one of those hosts from Lakbay TV, Discovery Channel, National Geographic or Star News Asia. Second is to be a flight attendant: that's the next best thing to being a travel show host, I get to go to countries for free. My job right now lets me travel in key Philippine cities for a few days at a time, and I guess that's not so bad after all. This month alone I'll go to Davao, Bacolod and Iloilo, and after doing my stuff for work, I'm free, free, free to spend the day. It's a start.

But before I see the world I'd like to see majority of my own country first. If it weren't for my job right now, the ONLY place I will have ever been to outside of Luzon is Kalibo and Boracay. There's so much beauty in the landscape and the people of the Philippines, it's just sad that most Filipinos don't realize that fact. They think there are greener pastures outside of this country. I admit that we have a long way to go, but COME ON, the pinoy islands and its people are not that bad.

But anyway! Back to my wailings. I really, really want to have a vacation! Mum and I are supposed to take a week off in July to visit my dad and go island hopping and wait for Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince. I just hope I'd be allowed to take that week off...sniff...sniff...

Ouch ('ata?)

2005-04-27T17:09:00.000+08:00

I believe Jody had a big smile on her face when I told her my results on this particular quiz. She just reworded "I told you so" as a response to me. Picky? Me? Picky? 'Lil ol' moi? Maybe, maybe not.

Mum called some minutes ago to tell me that her college bestfriend, Tita Dette's third and last daughter is getting married next year. Her eldest got married last November, her second is getting married this June. Mum was comically bawling over the phone, saying "Waaahhh, Dette...buti ka pa...!" I mean, what gives?!?!

Maybe I'm not just interested enough. Got a lot to do. Maybe I've already met my match somewhere along the road and I still have to realize it. Maybe I'm destined for single-blessedness.

Or, yeah, maybe I'm just too picky.

But I can't help it. I have non-negotiable values. I have fits. I have my moments of sanity (I'm usually insane). No guy has ever asked me what my standards are. I really don't like discussing my standards in public because they're far too private, even for my close friends. But hey, if a guy gets close enough, he could ask me. Better yet, he could look at my entry below entitled "Wanted: Man With the Following Qualities..." They're pretty easy (a guy friend told me that). O, yun naman pala eh...

I still believe, in God's own time, if it is according to His will for me, I will meet the guy He has chosen for me. I say this without a doubt, and with much faith. That is why I don't date frequently. I have nothing against blind dates or casual dating - it's just not my cup of tea. I hustle for the meantime - I try to learn new things, go to places, read new books, meet new people (not date new people). I try to learn how to cook, to clean the whole house (whew) and have the car tuned up. I have friends who brighten up my day, my parents and brother who love me and continuously drive me crazy, work and gym to keep me occupied, and God to turn to everytime I reach a dead end. I'm not saying I don't need a partner. I'm just saying, if it will come, it will come. And I shall recognize it.

So nevermind the bouts of loneliness paminsan-minsan. It is to be expected. Nevermind the pang of wistfulness I sometimes feel whenever I see couples holding hands. I know my time and his time has not come yet. We're still being prepared for each other (I'd like to think of if that way). He may be as lonely and alone as I am, or he got sidetracked by some girl or some situation right now that our time together has not come yet. We both have to go through the seasons we're going through right now. And by the time we're both ready, I am very sure that when we meet, sparks will DEFINITELY fly.

You Don't Have a Boyfriend Because You are Too Picky

You have no problem attracting guys - and even dating a little
It's just around second or third date time where you start to see faults
If a guy isn't near perfect, you're not into him.
It's good to have standards - but yours rule almost everyone out.

Why Don't You Have a Boyfriend Take This Quiz :-)

Find the Love of Your Life (and More Love Quizzes) at Your New Romance.

Ego Booster!

2005-04-27T16:15:00.000+08:00

You Are Sensual Sexy

You exude a luxiourous sensuality in your everyday lifeTurning heads every where you go, it's all about your sexy attitude.You're naturally hot - gorgeous in both sweats and stilettos.Your biggest problem is that your utra sexy self sometimes scares men away. What Kind of Sexy Are You? Take This Quiz :-)
Find the Love of Your Life (and More Love Quizzes) at Your New Romance.

Yet Another Quiz

2005-04-27T09:10:00.000+08:00

I'm addicted to online quizzes today. Mainly because my results are pretty accurate...

You Belong in Rome

You're a big city girl with a small town heart
Which is why you're attracted to the romance of Rome
Strolling down picture perfect streets, cappuccino in hand
And gorgeous Italian men - could life get any better?
What City Do You Belong in? Take This Quiz :-)
Find the Love of Your Life (and More Love Quizzes) at Your New Romance.

2005-04-27T08:59:00.000+08:00

Your Fashion Style is Classic

You like what's stood the test of time...
Simple, well styled clothes that don't scream trendy
You stay updated and modern, but your clothes stay in style for a while
You wouldn't be caught in animal prints, fake fur, or super bright colors
What's Your Fashion Style? Take This Quiz :-)
Find the Love of Your Life (and More Love Quizzes) at Your New Romance.

Really?

2005-04-27T08:53:00.000+08:00

You Are the Girl Next Door!

You're caring, warm, and the girl that nice guys want to marry.Uncomplicated and simple, you've got an easy going attitude guys love.But this doesn't mean you're dull - far from it!You're a great conversationalist, and you're an expert at living the good life.

What Kind of Girl Are You? Take This Quiz :-)

Find the Love of Your Life (and More Love Quizzes) at Your New Romance.

Galera

2005-04-26T22:35:00.000+08:00

the morning after
Originally uploaded by euniceiscrazy.

For the nth time, I went to Puerto Galera with my friends from the bank. Jen got a really huge bump on her forehead after colliding with Jody when we capsized on that stupid banana boat. There were five of us who rode on it and I was the onlu one who didn't encounter any mishaps (lucky me!). I'm too tired to post all the pictures here so I'm just gonna post one that is linked to my online public photo album (haha, yes, I also have an online PRIVATE photo album *smirk*)

The Art Of Waiting

2005-04-26T21:47:00.000+08:00

Finally...after a month and a half of failed downloads, Rob Thomas's Lonely No More is completed and currently blaring out of my laptop, car and Shmooshy. Patience is truly a virtue. Hearing Rob Thomas's voice made my failed attempts fade away. Victory, getting what you want is absolutely sweet and fulfilling, especially if you've toiled and worked hard for it. And waited for just the right time, the right place, the right opportunity for it to happen.

I remember the homily back in my baccalaureate mass rendered by one of my alma mater's very formidable, institutional and (dare I say) colorful personalities, Fr. Dacanay. He said that the image he wanted my batch to remember was a rocking chair - which connotes waiting, relaxing. There is value in waiting, he said; it was a time for us to ponder, to think, to sort out something that should be righted first before we can move on. The season of waiting brings out a lot of possibilities - lessons to be learned, people to meet, hardships to endure - all of which are supposed to hone us and (this sounds so cliché) make us a better person. It is one of life's ways of telling us Hey, slow down, you might miss this lesson, this person. My generation today moves so fast, we want to do A LOT of things before settling down (ick) that most of the time we wanted the "fast food" version of the lesson, no time dilly-dallying because there's so much to do!!! La-di-da! We count on weekends, retreats and sabbaticals to pause, take a deep breath, and try to process everything that happened so far. Which, in my case, yeah, I mostly remember the lesson, and then...yun lang. I am guilty of getting very impatient if I don't get the lesson right away. Therein lies the problem. I miss the essence of the lesson, the virtues and the values that come into play. At ang pagmemeron. Usually, when I get to this phase, I either call up Law, Jae or Jayvee and temporarily treat my Globe line as a landline, which of course jacks up my handphone bills to unbelievable amounts. It's a small price to pay for trying to keep my sanity, and I find it distressing that the last time I did that was about a year and a half ago.

There is value in waiting. I have A LOT of catching up to do. Seriously.

Am I?

2005-04-19T13:21:00.000+08:00

You are a GRAMMAR GOD!

Congratulations! If your mission in life
is not already to preserve the English tongue,
it should be. You can smell a grammtical
inaccuracy from fifty yards. Your speech is
revered by the underlings, though some may
blaspheme and call you a snob. They're just
jealous. Go out there and change the world.

How grammatically correct are you? (Revised with answer key)
brought to you by

Wanted: Male, with the following qualities...

2005-04-14T07:27:00.000+08:00

Received a lovely email just now. It pretty much encapsulates what I want in a man, and more. Here's the text of the said email:

==========

In a brief conversation, a man asked a woman, "What kind of man are you looking for?"

She sat quietly for a moment before looking him in the eye and asking, "Do you really want to know?"

Reluctantly, he said "Yes."

She began to expound...

"As a woman in this day and age, I am in a position to ask a man what he can do for me that I can't do for myself. I pay my own bills. I take care of my household without the help of any man... or woman for that matter. I am in the position to ask, "What can you bring to the table?"

The man looked at her. Clearly he thought that she was referring to money.

She quickly corrected his thought and stated, "I am not referring to money. I need something more. I need a man who is striving for perfection in every aspect of life."

He sat back in his chair, folded his arms, and asked her to explain. She said, "I am looking for someone who is striving for perfection mentally because I need conversation and mental stimulation. I don't need a simple-minded man."

"I am looking for someone who is striving for perfection spiritually because I don't need to be unequally yoked... believers mixed with unbelievers is a recipe for disaster."

"I need a man who is striving for perfection financially because I don't need a financial burden."

"I am looking for someone who is sensitive enough to understand what I go through as a woman, but strong enough to keep me grounded."

"I am looking for someone who I can respect. In order to be submissive, I must respect him. I cannot be submissive to a man who isn't taking care of his business. I have no problem being submissive... he just has to be worthy."

"God made woman to be a help mate for man. I can't help a man if he can't help himself." When she finished her spill, she looked at him.

He sat there with a puzzled look on his face. He said, "You are asking a lot."

She replied, "I'm worth a lot."

=)

=========

Exactamento. I may be asking for too much, but I would be very willing to give the same to the man I will be spending the rest of my life with, and more. Much, much more. Like fidelity, for example. I am not a simple young woman. I am complicated. I need someone who understands my quirks, my PMS, my bitchiness but he has to know when to fight back. He should know how to reason out with me, holds the same principles and values true and dear to his heart like mine. He should know how to be silly and spontaneous, to be jologs and sosyal in the right places at the right time. He should be patient, forgiving and loving. He should have learned hw to be alone, and be lonely. He would accompany me in my journey, in my pilgrimage in this life, and we'll walk hand-in-hand. My list is endless. But bear in mind that my list is also my standard for myself. Quid pro quo. So, is asking for too much too much? I don't think so.

Your Song

2005-04-13T17:19:00.000+08:00

Shmooshy's been drawing out my jologs side. I've been listening to such an eclectic mix of singers and musicians, from Moby, Oasis to Aqua, Backstreet Boys, 'N Sync, Michael learns to rock, to Ewan McGregor (I think Jen almost had a heart attack when she saw backstreet boys and bituing walang ningning on my playlist, hehehe).

Speaking of Ewan McGregor, I'm listening to his rendition of "Your Song" from the Moulin Rouge soundtrack. It brought back a conversation I had with Lawrence, one of my dearet friends, when I was in college. I told him that when I fall in love with someone in the future, I want to fall in love like the way Ewan sung that song: building up and then swelling with emotion, with Alessandro Safina and a whole orchestra swirling their music into a brilliant crescendo. Whew. He shook his head, and told me, "Hay nako, E-----, bahala ka. That's such a fantastic kind of love. It rarely comes true," with a hint of frustration lacing his voice. But still, I believe it will happen to me. Forget your heart and you listen to your heart. Find someone you can love like CRAZY and who will love you the same way back. Yeah, definitely. =)

Meet Shmooshy

2005-04-13T07:50:00.000+08:00

I'd like you to meet my Shmooshy! It arrived yesterday afternoon. I came home from work, and there it was, wrapped in a brown box lovingly shipped from my dad. Oooohhh, I grabbed it, locked myself in my room and proceeded to carefully, surgically cut off the meters of scotch tape wrapped around it. Since I just my second ever manicure in my life for a photo shoot (hahaha, really long story), I wasn't keen on ruining my finely polished, french-tipped nails that I paid an atrocious amount for (all for the love of Sigrid, hehehe), so the unwrapping took such long, agonizing minutes.

And then! It was free!!!! I reverently took the box and opened it. There it was, my Shmooshy, shining in its silver glory, still with the sticky things on its front and back. My dad took really great care of it, he even asked for my permission to use it when he was the one who bought it - go figure. My mum called me about five times to go to the dinner table (one call is usually enough to make me running). I was ecstatic, I wolfed down my dinner, washed my plates and my baunan, and promptly locked myself in my room again to figure out how Shmooshy worked. I took out my laptop, aptly named E----- Gorgeous (yes, I name my gadgets, my handphone is also named E----- Gorgeous, they're twins), and proceeded to install the CD that would make Shmooshy and E----- Gorgeous communicate. Ahhh, bliss, bliss, bliss! Thirty minutes later I was dancing around my room, bopping my head as I tried Shmooshy on. If anyone were to walk in my room at that moment they would really think I'm mentally deranged (ha, so what's new?). I am such a gadget geekfreak, I really think they turn me on more than guys, hahahahahahha!!!! (I'm pathetic. I don't care=)) So there. Believe me, one of these days I MIGHT just put a picture of me and Shmooshy together here.

On Loneliness

2005-03-31T07:57:00.000+08:00

First, I'm sharing an incident that happened just this morning at the MRT station. I got out of the car and followed my brother up the steps leading to the trains. A voice at my right asked, "Saan ka nag-wo-work?" I ignored it, of course, since I figured if it's someone I know he/she would've called out my name first, or, call me by my name should I remain silent after the question. This guy didn't. He asked that question again, and when I turned to see who that person was, I didn't have any bloody idea who he was. He was smiling, smirking, as he watched my obvious confusion as to who the bloody hell was he. I lowered my eyes, trying to project that I was a bit flustered, but in truth I was close to screaming "Sod off, you nasty wanker!" I know that I shouldn't have judged him by the way he looked, but he looked so creepy. He was unshaven, looked unclean, and he freaked me out. It was 7 o'clock in the bloody morning! Guys, please do not try to pick girls up at that uncivilized hour, especially when you're in the morning rush between seven to nine AM, in the city called Metro Manila. I love the city, but hell, we do have some colorful and shady characters going all around the metropolis. Those situations that two strangers meet each other on the subway or on the bus or on wherever only happens in the movies, got that? It rarely happens in real life. Or maybe I'm the kind of girl that attracts shady characters at seven on the morning. Haha, call that animal magnetism.

I got my PS yesterday afternoon, and I feel absolutely blessed! I do, I really do. I didn't count my moolah at the office because I was too shy to do so. I called my mum and dad, and they were so proud and happy for me. When I hung up, I still felt the need to share the good news with a particular third person, but then it hit me: I do not have that particular person to share it with. That person is non-existent, and at that moment I felt at a loss for emotions, for words. The third person that I'm talking about is supposed to be my significant other. Since I don't have one, I was hit by a pang of loneliness, of wistfulness, of ache, perhaps. I imagined that if there was this someone for me, I think he would be the one that I'd call first. Really. I would've wanted to share the news with him first. But he's not here, with me (yet). I don't even know who he is! That loneliness resonated within me throughout the day. And it was a reminder that I am still human. I forget it most of the time.

I'd like to end my entry with one of the best lines from my all-time favorite, feel good, life-is-brilliantly, poignantly beautiful movie, Meet Joe Black. The scene is where Bill Parrish (Anthony Hopkins) his daughter Susan (Claire Forlani) are on board his helicopter, having a talk about (guess what?) love. Here goes.

Bill: I know it’s a cornball thing. But love is passion, obsession. Something you can’t live without. I say, fall head over heels. Find someone you can love like crazy and who will love you the same way back. How do you find him? Well, you forget your head and you listen to your heart. I’m not hearing any heart. ‘Cause the truth is, honey, there’s no sense living your life without this. To make the journey and not fall deeply in love, well, you haven’t lived a life at all. But you have to try, ‘cause if you haven’t tried, you haven’t lived.

I haven't quite mastered the "forget your head and you listen to your heart" skill, but hey, I'm trying. I'm doing my utmost. And it's looking beautiful ahead.

Mixed emotions

2005-03-24T22:58:00.000+08:00

Just watched ‘Closer.’ ‘Tis a beautiful movie, but one that won’t probably appreciated by most people. It captured raw and real emotions very reminiscent of the reality TV shows prevalent today. And it bloody played with my emotions and my mind as well.

Jude Law was brilliant as Dan, the photographer who’s obsessively in love with Anna, the character played by the heartbreakingly beautiful Julia Roberts. Clive Owen and Natalie Portman were a bit rusty, but they gave stellar performances. I feel Natalie looks too clean and innocent to play a stripper, you would really think she’s acting, but you gotta give her an A for effort. Summary of the plot? They screwed each other, broke up, got back together, and then broke up again. I can’t get any blunter than that. The bloody movie plays with the audience’s emotions; hell, I can’t even tell who’s telling the truth or not even after the movie ended. “Why did you tell me?” “Because we promised each other to always tell the truth…” (after admitting sleeping with someone). The truth almost always makes you feel you just slammed into a brick wall and then you end up wishing you hadn’t heard the truth at all. But you still want the truth because in the end, you can’t live without knowing the truth. (Why do I feel like Morpheus here?) Brilliant. Truth is both absolute and relative; it takes faith to discern what you would believe, what you want to believe. (I am thanking my Philosophy classes for making me think. I do hope my professor’s proud of me.) I’m cutting this short, precisely because I do not know how to end this, this is just me thinking out loud. I might revise this should I ever get my thoughts together.

saturday fun fun fun!

2005-03-13T18:22:00.000+08:00

sana'y masabi sa awit kong ito
Originally uploaded by euniceiscrazy.

Yesterday we had a Sales and Service Rally on my company. It was so fun, I really enjoyed myself. The day's activities included the group competition of the various teams composed of our branches all over the Philippines, and it was so funny seeing them in such a different, light-hearted mood. My boss' daughter, Niki, who just happened to be the It girl from the newest Coke commercial, was there and rendered two songs: the one she sang from her commercial, and Mariah Carey's "Hero." I must say, that girl not only has the beauty and the brains, but one of the best voices I've ever heard (and I'm not sucking up because my boss doesn't even know I have a blog). Ang lupit! She's pretty young, only seventeen, and she's the girl version of my boss.

Afterwards we all headed for Bagaberde for an evening of food, fellowship and fun. MYMP and U-Turn played and...wow, ayos! And then we danced the night away!!! Me and Jody both had our respective "Crushes of the Night." I even got a picture of my crush for the night, thanks to my handy dandy camera. 'Tis a harmless crush, really.

sana'y masabi sa awit kong ito...Ã

after a couple of dances

2005-03-13T18:18:00.000+08:00

after a couple of dances
Originally uploaded by euniceiscrazy.

dan the accountant slash MBA slash huskyboy, sigrid idith, jen the hot rocker chick, will the meek hunk, and lil ol' moi

almost the whole 4th floor

2005-03-13T18:17:00.000+08:00

almost the whole 4th floor
Originally uploaded by euniceiscrazy.

partying it up at Bagaberde

toy soldier

2005-03-13T18:15:00.000+08:00

toy soldier
Originally uploaded by euniceiscrazy.

me with william andrew lee, the phatest looking toy soldier i've ever seen

obsession goes pffffttttttt, kaput, zilch, nada

2005-03-09T11:30:00.000+08:00

Great. My Orlando obsession lasted for about two weeks then it went pffffttttt this morning. The Jude Law semi-obsession lasted about a day and a half, and the Elijah goo-goo eyes about one hour. My heart is so inconstant then (or maybe it's the fact that I never really, truly liked these guys in the first place). They just actors, for crying out loud. (Good looking actors, fine, but actors nonetheless. I can hear my friends say, "ahahahay, finally she comes back to earth.") Yeah yeah, I'm back to earth.

my bouts with obsession (for foreign actors) came to a peak about a year ago with Daniel Radcliffe. Yes, he's the young guy who played Harry Potter. I wasn't as expressive of it like with my Orlando obsession, but it was more...manic. Maybe I didn't want my friends to know that I fancy younger guys lest I be labeled a pedophile ("my goodness, E-----, he's just fifteen!") Everytime I remember what I did during the height of HP3, I cringe and lament over the money I spent. I watched it four times in the big screen (broke my LOTR3 record of three), and...well, I won't go to the details. The fire dies out, eventually, as you can see.

I can see myself cringing in the future when I will look back to my Orlando obsession. Honestly, now, what in the bloody hell was I thinking? I learned to use the adjective "bloody" for every noun in my sentence, the use of British slang words like telly, bloke, mate (the others are unrpintable). I think most girls had a bout with obsession for foreign actors and singers, but hey, it's a part of growing up. Of being a girl. Of still being able to realize that gorgeous faces still make my heart beat faster. Of being able to realize that they may be gorgeous, but then, (and now) they're just...faces. No substance. And most of all, to be able to realize that it takes more than a gorgeous face to make my heart beat faster in the long run. (naks, how very touchy feely). What does it take, you ask? Well, that's another story. *smile*

obsessed about orlando

2005-03-01T11:32:00.000+08:00

yes! i admit it! and i am PROUD to admit it! i have fallen madly in love with Orlando Bloom (i wish you could hear me sigh...)!!! and before you say "you and every other hot-blooded woman who's seen LOTR," take note that yes, he was gorgeous in LOTR, but i was drooling over Viggo a.k.a. King Aragorn. Orlando was too clean back in LOTR. i have a preference over rugged males. so when i saw Pirates of the Carribean on cable last weekend, i just found myself staring at the telly, waiting for the close-up of that dashing William Turner (see, i even started using Brit slang to get in the mood). My wallpaper is, of course, a black haired Orlando, with those dark intense eyes staring at me all the time. In fact, whilst i was talking to one of my male friends over the phone yesterday, i promptly drifted off when i saw him on my PC. after a few moments my friend said, "hey are you still there?" "Oh, sorry, I was staring at Orlando right now, C----, how can you possibly compete?" I could almost see him roll his eyes at my response.

I just love the symmetry of his face. I am a sucker for dark eyes and great smile (ha, can you tell? Read my previous post about Constantine), so it's no wonder i am obsessed with him right now. I know my adoration will soon fade, but heck, I haven't had a crush on someone in such a long time that I'm going to make the most out of this obsession of mine. I was seriously considering taking up my masters in England (yep, i was, am, that obsessed) just so the chance of me bumping into him was greater. Pathetic, huh? Give it a month and I'll probably be back to my old self. My flavor this March is the Mr. Orlando Bloom. But now I'm wondering who's going to be in April?

peeping tom...er, me

2005-02-26T19:21:00.000+08:00

went to EK yesterday with my colleagues at work. twas fun fun fun, but so tiring as well, not to mention, expensive! i wished our paintball game could've gone much longer, but the boys kept on firing their shots until such time that they didn't have any left anymore. that pretty much decided that we (da girls) won! nya-nya-nya-nya-nya =P

one of my friends from college made an "enchanted kingdom list" when we went there back then, so i'm attempting to make one for our (my colleagues) trip! here it is!

The Official Enchanted Kingdom List

1. Official Ticket Buyer: Eunice

2. Official Transpo: Paolo, Jerome and Andrew

3. Official Lunch: McDo at South

4. Official Cutest Baby: Sammy!

5. Official EK first timers: Oli and Jen

6. Official Enchanted Kingdom Ride: Anchor's Away!!! (di ba Jody?!?)

7. Official Enchanted Kingdom Reality (kuno) game: Paintball

8. Official Wet Ride: Rio Grande Rapids (si Pao lang ang hindi nabasa)

9. Official Enchanted Kingdom Loser Ride: Rialto's Smash something (olats talaga!)

10.Official Enchanted Kingdom Slowest Moving Queue Ride: It's a tie between the Wheel Of Fate and Bump 'n Splash

11.Official Enchanted Kingdom Frozen Riders at the coolest rides: Paolo and Jianne

12.Official Enchanted Kingdom Screamer: Jody

13.Official EK merienda: Hotdogs and mineral water

14.Official Enchanted Kingdom Photogenic Person: Will

15.Official Enchanted Kingdom Dinner: Digger's Treat

16.Official EK Photographers: Eunice and Jody (and EK staff!)

the pics i took were sooo funny. i like the fact that most of the people who went with us were DEFINITELY NOT camera shy! i'm posting the shots that are not so goofy, so me and my friends could retain some amount of dignity. =)

IMG_2788a
Originally uploaded by euniceiscrazy.

packing up

2005-02-26T19:20:00.000+08:00

IMG_2785a
Originally uploaded by euniceiscrazy.

after the log jam

2005-02-26T19:19:00.000+08:00

IMG_2670a
Originally uploaded by euniceiscrazy.

the most overused shot ever

2005-02-26T19:17:00.000+08:00

IMG_2781a
Originally uploaded by euniceiscrazy.

in the heat of summer sunshine

2005-02-26T19:01:00.000+08:00

IMG_2663a
Originally uploaded by euniceiscrazy.

boredom shmoredom

2005-02-24T22:35:00.000+08:00

1. Call me -

2. What color of pants are you wearing right now?- yellow shorts

3. What Are You Listening To Right Now?- hush by LL Cool J

4. What Was The Last Thing You Ate?- misua and brownies baked by mommee dear

5. Do You Believe In Karma?- yup

6. If You Were A Crayon, what color would yoube right now?- bright blue...perky perky!

7. How Is The Weather Today?- i honestly wouldn't know (you wouldn't, too, if you're holed up in a closed airconditioned place all day long)

8. Last Person You Talked To On The Phone?- mommee

9. Do You Like The Person Who Sent You This?- oh yeah definitely

10. How Are You Today?- darned tired

11. Favorite Drink?- H2O

12. Favorite Alcoholic Drink?- mule

13. Favorite Sports- body combat and jaywalking in ayala ave around 8pm (it was over that closed fence, actually)

14. Hair Color?- black

15. Eye Color?- dark brown

16. Favorite Band/Group?- none

17. Favorite song?- marami

18. Favorite Month/s?- October - hmmm quay ba't kaya hwehehehe ako september

19. Favorite Foods?- marami matakaw ako eh

20. Last Movie You Watched?- "Constantine. John Constantine." (keanu was so hot! and gavin too!)

21. Favorite Day of the Year?- 29th of every month and my birthday - bakit na naman kaya hehehehe ako birthday ko

23. What Was Your Favorite Toy As A Child?- my crossword puzzle book for kids (yup i was a nerd)

24. Summer or Winter?- summer

25. Hugs Or Kisses?- hugs AND kisses--eeewwww hehehe hug na lang akin

26. Chocolate Or Vanilla?- Chocolate

27. Do You Want Your Friends To Write/E-Mail Back?- sure, that'd be nice

28. Who Is Most Likely To Respond?- those who don't have anything to do

29. Who Is Least Likely To Respond?- those who don't check their friendster account

30. Do You Think You're Normal?- gosh no. i'm proud to be weird.

31. What Is Under Your Bed?- boxes filled with my, uh, knick knacks (please don't let there be a dead rat)

32. Friends You Have Had The Longest?- CJSAMME--hear hear!!!

33. What Did You Do Yesterday?- work, body combat, eat

34. Favorite Smells?- freshly baked doughnuts...yum

35. Who Inspires You?- God

36. What Are You Afraid Of?- rats!

37. Plain, Buttered Or Salted Popcorn?- buttered

38. favorite flower?- roses

39. Number Of Keys On Your Key Ring?- 3

40. Favorite Days Of The Week?- weekend

sleepiness...and Constantine

2005-02-23T16:20:00.000+08:00

Does anyone know a cure for sleepiness? I've googled that question and most websites say that the cure for daytime sleepiness is ENOUGH SLEEP! And, obviously, I don't get a lot of that. I usually get about 5-6 hours of sleep every night, 7 if I'm lucky (which is about once a week), 8 hours every weekends, and 9 if i'm very, very lucky. My work and the gym take up most of my waking hours, and I always, always, insist in reading something before I sleep every night, even if it's as trivial as a comic section in the daily broadsheets. And that darned game installed in my phone doesn't help - keeps me awake for a few more minutes, me hoping to get a higher score than my previous high score.

I am stressed out. And I have just learned that stress can cause cancer (gasp! nooooo!!!!!). So I'm taking things slow...easy...one at a time. I don't want to die because of that disease.

My friends and I watched Constantine last night (see, one of the reasons why I wasn't able to sleep early last night was because of that gorgeous hunk Keanu Reeves, and I don't care if he's gay darnit! Although luscious Gavin Rossdale was, well...luscious too...ooh lala) and it was worth it, but I'd probably watch it one more time in order to understand some of the parts and words of the actors. There was just one teeny problem. The love angle between Constantine and Angela wasn't thoroughly developed. I'm a romantic at heart, so sue me. Or maybe I just didn't like the way Constantine kept Angela hanging. Because I don't like guys who keep girls hanging, period. Haha, i'm sure most girls out there can relate. Peace out.

PS. The way "Constantine, John Constantine" was said reminded me of "Bond, James Bond."

thoughts at 10:30 am

2005-02-06T10:15:00.000+08:00

cha-nis nu yir!!! yeah! daming tikoy sa bahay ngayon. later this lunch our whole family will go to gloria maris to celebrate. my kowa called us up to prepare ang paos for our youngest cousin kasi pagsusuotin niya ng cheongsam. the ang paos are going to be used for bribery...nyahahahahaha @_@

chinese lunches and dinners are vharcteristically loooooong and so filling. i'm a glutton, and that's hardly any news, but still, my mouth starts to water whenever i lay my eyes on any hot prawn salad...like i've never tasted any before. the peking duck, the asado, the shark's fin soup (yah, ecologically detrimental, not environmentally friendly, but they taste so good) and the buchis!!! and i haven't started eating yet. i'm starting to get ravenous. peace out.

lazing around

2005-01-29T13:58:00.000+08:00

had a very busy week. we might be moving to a new place (finally!) soon. it's pretty near our grandma's house. i'd get to decorate the sala and my room. i'm thinking of a japanese themed home, very minimalist but really comfortable.

i'm planning to buy an mp3 player. i was looking around and fell in love with the zen micro and the iPod. then my dad said, "what are you going to do with 4-5 GB of memory? Pustahan tayo yung 256 MB hindi mo mapapakinggan lahat sa isang araw..." good point. most of the people i know who are music maniacs already had the Ipod or the Zen Micro. it's a status symbol as well (who cares?) and besides, the smaller the memory, the cheaper it will be for me. so i'm settling for the 512 mb muvo slim. am going to the mall later and swipe my card (hwehehehehehe)

my mom's premonition

2005-01-16T20:25:00.000+08:00

I picked my mom up from the airport this afternoon, and we chatted as I drove us home. She ventured asking me about my lovelife (or rather, the nonexistence thereof) and I, of course told her truthfully that there wasn't someone in my life right now. (There hasn't been anyone at all-I'm still a card carrying member of the Single Since Birth Club and I don't see myself giving up that membership anytime soon. Hehehe) She then said, "Hmm... alam mo, ang kutob ko sa 'yo, kapag nagka-boyfriend ka, yun na."

"...yun na, meaning...yun na yung mapapangasawa ko? Parang yung kay Tin?" I asked.

"Oo. Eh ewan ko lang, magaling ako sa kutuban, di ba?" my mom answered.

Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. It was nice in a way, because I really believe that the "First and Last" thing could happen, and I'm hoping it will happen to me. But hearing my mom say it made me half-scared. I know I don't want to married yet (heaven forbid). Opened up a lot of topics in my mind. Mothers.

and we have a winner!

2005-01-16T09:23:00.000+08:00

my friend guessed the correct answers in about 5 mins after he read my post. damn. but he's not over in manila yet, so it would take time before he could claim his prize. hwehehehehe.

III

2005-01-15T18:57:00.000+08:00

Second week gone, third one's coming. Got a call from a lunatic yesterday at lunchtime that made me lie and say that I am married so that he could conveniently get off the phone (I swear, that has got to be the cheapest way to meet girls) and off my back. After I hung up, one of my colleagues was grinning at me, and said "E----, may asawa ka na pala, hindi namin alam!?!" Grrrr...

"Look inside my heart, love is all you'll see..."

I just had my first paycheck for the year, and most of it will go to my credit card bills. I can't do any more shopping as much as I used to because I've just made a major financial decision (and expense, if I may add) that's going to cut my usable funds by one third. Aaaarggghhh.

"You touch me and something in me know what I could have with you..."

Met someone last night through my friends at Diner's. He's nice.

"There are these changes that we cannot end..."

I gained weight!!! Yey!!! I'll be out of my office on Monday and Wednesday doing 'official business' outside! Double yey!!!

"Free to scream, free to bathe, free to paint my toes all day..."

The italicized words are lyrics of songs that have a common theme. The first one to guess correctly the songs and its common theme gets a starbucks frappuccino from me. Of course, you have to go to Ayala Avenue to get your free drink. Ciao!

first day

2005-01-03T21:53:00.000+08:00

back to work!!! ha, it was not as bad as i thought. sure, i still had deadlines, and i have to wear our uniform that makes me look like a teacher-slash-flight attendant, but all in all it was pretty good. i love the way the uniform fitted me perfectly. i loved the way everyone greeted me happy new year. i loved the way how the people at the 4th floor looked oh so spiffy and ready to take on another year. and i'm saying this from the bottom of my heart ^_^ oh, except for ms. la bamba and her jasmine trias look and pompom skirt. hehehe.

1. What did you do in 2004 that wished you'd never done?
- wala. i have no regrets =) oh, maybe i shouldn't have charged that much to my credit cards, but that's it.

2. Did you keep your new years' resolutions, andwill you make more for next year?
-i never make resolutions on new year. i make them all year round =)

3. Did anyone close to you gave birth?
- no, but next year one of my dear friends will give birth

4. Did anyone close to you die?- no

5. What countries did you visit?- sing

6. What would you like to have in 2005 that you lacked in 2004?
- uh, boyfriend?

7. What date from 2004 will remain etched upon your memory?
- marami eh. feb 19 - the day i learned i passed my revalida

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
- putting up with her

9. What was your biggest failure?
- trying not to charge to my credit cards

10. Did you suffer an illness or injury?
-yup, i got sick for twelve whole hours

11. What was the best thing you bought?
- my phone

12. Where did most of your money go?
-phone and credit card bills and endowment funds and food!

13. What did you get really, really excited about?
- the promise of a new year

14. What song will always remind you of 2004?
- the most oversung of all, rainbow by south border. and hollywood by madonna

15. Compared to this time last year, are you:
i. a little bit of both - ????
ii. thinner or fatter?-- fatter! yey!!
iii. richer or poorer? -- richer mwahahahaha

16. What do you wish you'd done more
- to have talked to my friends in faraway lands more. babawi talaga ako

17. What do you wish you'd done less of?
- spending cash for (gasp!) clothes

18. How will you be spending Christmas?
- with my fam

19. Did you fall in love in 2004?
- fall out was more like it

20. How many one-night stands?
- ako? asa pa.

21. What was your favorite TV program?
- none. i always channel surf

22. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
- none. i try to keep the negative out

23. What was the best book you read?
- aside from the Bible and the left behind series, the chronicles of narnia, atlas shrugged and one hundred years of solitude

24. What was your greatest musical discovery?
- i went back to madonna =)

25. What do you want to get?
- aside from more money, one whole month of vacation without any interruptions from work. hehe.

26. What was your favorite film of this year?
- before sunset

27. What did you do on your birthday, and howold were you?
- i turned 23 and i lazed around the whole day in my PJ's. sarap!

28. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
- getting unlimited free massages

29. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2004
- i bought more clothes for hanging out, nights out, the beach more than corporate attires. go figure.

30. What kept you sane?
- my friends (even those who are not in manila, i'd talk to them for hours on end) my family and the gym

31. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
- i AM a shameless fan of erik santos.

32. What political issue stirred you the most?
- the elections

33. Who do you miss?
- my friends and my mom

34. Who was the best new person you met?
- persons ito eh. the adorable japanese cook, mr. max brenner, ms. lola and the whole fourth floor in my office. i love those guys =)

35. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2004:
- be ready to use your heart in every way you can. fall in love, reach out, know when it's time to hold on and when to let go. oh, and have lots and lots of patience.

the calm before the storm

2005-01-02T16:19:00.000+08:00

I did so many things today. I watched one of my cousins pluck and shape her eyebrows with the skill of a highly trained surgeon. I played skribbage with my cousins, read my current thrashy, girlie novel entitled "The Devil Wears Prada" many times over, ate one pack of hello panda biscuits and then two pairs of bread with sweet pork. I read "Left Behind" in one whole day, slept for 12 hours, tinkered with my phone, checked my friendster account and answered so many surveys just to keep my mind off one thing: TOMORROW, January 3, 2005.

Why?

Because tomorrow, I will be going back to being a corporate slave. Deadlines, bosses, resigning boss, targets, budgets, area meetings. Just thinking about it makes me feel so nauseous.

Of course, there's always lunch time and gym time, which I always, always look forward to. And also paydays. Hoo boy. I don't want this day to end. Seriously.

the beginning

2005-01-02T15:32:00.000+08:00

I was trying to decide what template to use...choices, choices.

I had my heart set on the pink colored template, but wisely decided against it. I have too much angst to be construed wearing rose colored glasses, and the pink theme was SO legally blonde 2. So i decided on a nice, sensibly(?) colored template but with a pink section.

what the heck am i saying?

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